Hypothetical scenario: Your five-year-old begins to misbehave, biting your houseguests and mimicking all sorts of uncouth swearwords. After a few warnings, you decide that your son no longer merits your supervision, and you banish him to the streets. Once out of your custody, you hear he's joined a gang and engages in a variety of criminal activities.

These Quakers certainly like their drama. Despite trailing, 24-0, at the half after a woeful opening two quarters, Penn fought back with a furious second-half rally, ultimately falling to Lafayette, 24-17. Quarterback Rob Curley led the Leopards, completing 12 of 22 passes for 163 yards and three first-half touchdowns.

When student cultural groups want to practice for performances, they face a shortage of space in high demand and often resort to cramped classrooms and high-rise lounges at odd hours. But thanks to summer updates to the ARCH building - the home base for many campus cultural organizations and minority coalitions - students will soon have a basement equipped with floor-to-ceiling mirrors and a springy dance floor.

To explain why one person supports tougher immigration polices and another staunchly opposes the Iraq War, blame biology. University of Nebraska at Lincoln researchers recently compared physiological responses with participants' political views, representing one of the most recent ways scholars are relating biology and politics.

Goalkeeper Drew Healy has a simple formula that has propelled the Quakers - the only Division I team that hasn't been scored upon - to early-season heights. "If you don't give up goals, you don't lose," said Healy, the reigning Ivy League Player of the Week.

It's finally here: The Athletic Department has released the Penn men's basketball schedule for the 2008-09 season. Most matchups come as no surprise. The Daily Pennsylvanian has been reporting details of the schedule since mid-July as other teams released their slates.

Along with new classes and a greater workload, many students came back to school facing something else unwanted - a new layout for their Facebook accounts. The popular social-networking site gave users the choice to switch to the "New Facebook" over the summer, before permanently replacing the layout earlier this month.

Penn and the Psychoanalytic Center of Philadelphia co-sponsored the program "Anti-Semitism in the Freud Case Histories" last night at Steinhardt Hall. The program, part of the Freud, Franklin and Beyond series of lectures on psychology, culture and society, was co-sponsored in conjunction with Hillel and the Jewish Studies Program.

Penn's ban on NSO fraternity parties makes about as much sense as Prohibition. Since 1996, the University has forbidden InterFraternity Council member organizations from holding events during New Student Orientation. Administrators instituted the policy because the parties often conflicted with the NSO schedule, causing freshmen to skip important class events.

Though the economy has recently forced many students to tighten their belts, Penn is still encouraging seniors to give some of their extra cash back to the University. Yesterday marked the launch of the 2009 Senior Class Gift Drive, "Unite ONine" in which proceeds go towards the Penn Fund, an endowment for undergraduate education.

'In the far distance a helicopter skimmed down between the roofs," wrote George Orwell in the opening scene of his classic novel, 1984. "It was the police patrol, snooping into people's windows." So begins Orwell's terrifying vision of a future in which the state watches each and every citizen, keeping track of their habits, even dictating thoughts.

Director of Sustainability for Philadelphia Mark Alan Hughes presented a lecture on the city government's new plan for environmentally responsible change yesterday at the Chemistry Building. Hughes elaborated the steps needed to become more sustainable through internal bureaucracy changes and current action items.

The Rethinking Student Aid panel, an independent group of the country's top financial-aid and higher-education experts, has released a proposal to simplify the federal financial-aid system. Proponents hope the plan - which was in the works for two years - will make college more accessible for low- and moderate-income students.

Sex is shaking up campus - again. The literary erotica magazine Quake, which disappeared from Penn after a two-year existence from 2005-2007, is being reincarnated this semester. "Sexuality is very interesting," said College sophomore Trisha Low, Quake editor-in-chief.

For many Penn students, Chinatown is a place to go for bubble tea, a cheap bus ticket to New York or for BYOBs with inexpensive Asian food and lax enforcement of drinking laws. For the close-to-1,000 residents of Chinatown, it's home. Today's Chinatown grew from a small Chinese-owned laundry in the late 19th century into a true community with dozens of small businesses, arts organizations and a charter elementary school.

With so much attention bestowed on Penn quarterback Robert Irvin and his backup-slash-punter Kyle Olson, most people have probably forgotten about junior Brendan McNally. McNally saw some snaps in five games last year as the second-stringer to then-senior Bryan Walker.

Michelle Obama stood before a crowd of about 2,000 in southwest Philadelphia yesterday, and asked them to engage in something her husband knows all about: community organizing. "Everybody in this crowd knows 10 or 20 people who are not paying attention" to the election, said Obama, the wife of Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama.