Wharton presentation not business as usual

Thirty students showed up to hear a speaker, but instead got a stripper. It certainly wasn't business as usual at the Wharton School yesterday evening. Sure, the 5:00 p.m. recruiting presentation by "International Management Associates" looked routine. But instead of jobs, the 30 MBA students who gathered in room 213 of Steinberg-Dietrich Hall got a healthy dose of skin. After a brief introduction, the presenter declared, "I'd like to show you why our company is so different." Then, with his permed hair flying and his black cowboy boots tapping to the beat of the Artist Formerly Known as Prince's "Cream," he proceeded to strip down to a black g-string. They may sit behind desks all day, but the students in attendance ran out of the room with the speed of Olympic athletes. Outside, ties were off-kilter, brief case contents spilled out and general confusion ensued. "This is unreal. I can't believe this is happening. I mean, this is Wharton," said one flustered first-year graduate student who requested anonymity. Others thought differently. "I think it's kind of funny.?This is a reminder that we shouldn't take all these job pressures too seriously," said another student. The only consensus was found between the lines of closed mouths: no one would reveal any information relating to the planning of this practical joke or to the identity of the masterminds behind it. But it was clear that some knew. "Let's just say that I came to this presentation because I knew they'd be presenting something special," laughed a Wharton senior who also requesting anonymity. "But I thought this was going to be a woman stripper," he added. Most of the graduate students who attended the event, however, had absolutely no idea of what was in store. Some had gotten a standard presentation notice over e-mail or listservs. Or they had seen the two flyers posted in Vance Hall. If they had looked a little closer, however, they might of noticed some subtle clues pointing to the hoax. The names underneath "International Management Associates," lists "Tallyrand, Oliver, Ostermann, and Lyttle," whose first letters, when placed together, spell "I'M A TOOL." The talk was also appropriately entitled "The Naked Truth." It only got worse in the actual presentation. Before his talk began, the presenter introduced himself as "Dick Long," and apologized that his boss "L. John Silver" was delayed. Then, he described his company as responsible for the "develop[ment] of the largest waterbed manufacturer and the largest leather producer in Asia [as well as]? four significant prophylactic distributors."