Panel: Busy women can 'avoid insanity'

Can women have it all -- marriage, work, children and more? The answer is a resounding "yes," according to the Trustees' Council of Penn Women. On Thursday evening, a panel of five women from the council gathered at the Veranda, the new student center at 3615 Locust Walk, to discuss the challenges faced by modern women. Each woman shared her personal experiences on how she balances marriage, family and community responsibilities. Their stories demonstrate how it is possible for women to succeed in life without sacrificing their careers. Real Estate and Legal Studies Professor Georgette Poindexter had many tips for the 35 students gathered about how to "avoid insanity" while raising a family and cultivating a career at the same time. "Lower your expectations," Poindexter suggested. "We are all overachievers. You're not a sitcom mom. You can't do anything perfectly." All of the women stressed the importance of finding a husband who is supportive of one's decisions and willing to accept responsibility in raising a family. Toba Kerson, a sociology professor at Bryn Mawr College, added that "one secret was to marry my best friend, which is the best advice that I can offer any of you." Although the women's careers were all different -- the group included two professors, a pediatrician, a real estate manager and a lawyer -- they all said they were satisfied with their jobs. Renee Sackey, vice president and general counsel of RE/MAX Real Estate of Southeastern Pennsylvania, informed the crowd, "If you love your job, you never work a day in your life." Children were also an important part of the women's lives. With the help of live-in nannies and day care centers, the women said that they could have children and still continue to work. However, maintaining the balance between home and work is not always easy. "I was kissing my son in the morning, playing lawyer all day, coming home and my nanny had put my son in bed," Poindexter recalled. "I realized this was not why I became a mother." She later decided to teach and stay home with her son in the summer. The panel emphasized that women can achieve their goals, but those goals have to be realistic. "Can you have it all?" Sackey asked. "The answer is yes. But the question is, What is 'all' to you?" She pointed out that there many ways that a woman can have a fulfilling life, but that women also have to make important decisions based on their needs. The women attending the panel varied in their opinions of life after college. "We're at Penn," College junior Cecilia Rothenberger said. "We didn't work four years to not have a career." College junior Pam Rapoport, an Elementary Education major, added that she "firmly" believes "in staying home with children until they go to school. I wanted to pick a career that lent itself to that flexibility." The Trustees' Council of Penn Women was created 11 years ago to provide undergraduate women with a network of professional alumnae. Students can apply for a mentor in the council over the Internet. Elsie Sterling Howard, president of the Penn Alumnae Society and past chairperson of the council, said that "for a Penn woman, the sky's the limit, and we're here to help. We'll rig the parachute."