COLUMN: A Penn grad shines in NFL

From Andy Meran's "Meran's Law," Fall '95 He is known as Touchdown Joe and his last name is not Montana. It is Valerio. Touchdown Joe Valerio. A superstar among superstars. Every pass he has caught has been for a touchdown. And what's even more impressive is Valerio is one of us. He graduated from this fine Ivy institution in 1990. Funny thing is, Valerio never caught a pass as a Quaker. He was a stalwart on the offensive line in the Gary Steele era, when fifth-place Ivy finishes were the norm. Valerio quickly asserted himself as a solid blocker and was named the Quakers' most improved player in 1989. One year later, he captured the Bednarik Award as the top lineman on the squad. Despite Penn's losing ways, Valerio received enough attention to garner interest among NFL teams. Sure enough, the Kansas City Chiefs selected the touchdown maker in the second round of the 1991 draft. At the time, the Chiefs had no idea how much of a steal Valerio would turn out to be. The first clue came on Oct. 3, 1993. The Chiefs were battling the Raiders in a pivotal early-season AFC showdown. Kansas City had acquired a quarterback in the offseason by the name of Montana. With the likes of Jerry Rice, John Taylor and Brent Jones left behind in San Francisco, Montana was in search of some new targets. Kansas City possessed talented receiver Willie Davis and veteran tailback Marcus Allen, but something was missing. Montana did not waste any time finding the missing piece. With the ball sitting squarely on the one-yard line, Valerio entered the game and reported as an eligible receiver. With the Raiders keyed for the run, Montana faked the handoff to Allen. Using his deceptive speed, Valerio rolled off the end of the line and planted himself in a wide open area in the end zone. Montana was not about to miss such a target, and the soft hands of Touchdown Joe hauled in the pigskin for his first NFL catch and his first NFL touchdown. Hence, the legend of Touchdown Joe was born. After serving as a decoy for the remainder of the 1993 season, Valerio struck paydirt again on Sept. 11, 1994. The Chiefs unveiled their famous tackle-eligible play in Montana's first game against his old team. With the 49ers on their heels, Valerio hauled in another 1-yard touchdown reception. One month later in Denver, Touchdown Joe was at it again. In front of a national Monday night audience against the Denver Broncos, the Quakers grad also wanted to show he could be a threat from further downfield than the 1-yard line. So this time, with the ball situated on the Broncos' 4-yard line, Valerio faked a block and headed into the left flat. For the first time in his NFL career, Touchdown Joe was not in the end zone as he caught the pass. Instead Valerio found himself at the 2-yard-line. With the touchdown streak in jeopardy, the lineman-turned-receiver proved he could run after the catch and headed straight into the end zone. Three catches, three touchdowns. Some wondered if Valerio's touchdown-scoring days were over when Montana retired, if he was going to turn into just another regular offensive lineman. Valerio put all of his skeptics to rest last Sunday. In a return to his patented 1-yard touchdown catch, Valerio hauled in a Steve Bono offering to help lead the Chiefs to an easy victory over the Arizona Cardinals. The catch was Valerio's fourth, placing him in elite company. Just for reference sake, Jerry Rice averages approximately one touchdown for every 10 catches, Steve Largent about one for every eight. Joe Valerio: one TD for every catch. That's right, the best touchdown-per-catch percentage in NFL history is held by a former Penn offensive lineman. But that isn't where the lineman's heroics stopped Sunday. Against an over-pursuing Arizona defense, Kansas City called a bootleg that worked to perfection. While everyone on the offense and defense headed to the left side of the field, Steve Bono snuck off to the right. Only one other person was in sight. It was Touchdown Joe, showing off his speed and waving Bono onward into the end zone. The best Penn professional athlete of the decade continues to shine.