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How often do we fall asleep at night plagued by one incessant thought: There's not an Instagram purely for chronicling dead animals at Penn! There are so many hawk-mauled squirrels and fence-impaled possums, and no place where they can all rest in photographic peace!
Don't let the drizzle get you down! Nurse that hallow-hangover with some pretty pictures of our campus. Thanks to those who answered our plaintive request for pornographic foliage. And thanks to our winners: Sarah Escape, Shira Papir, Syra Ortiz-Blanes, and some random person who just texted us a pic from their phone. Click through for the rest!
Everyone has been a sexy cat for halloween. You have, your friends have, your mom did in 1978. George Washington dressed as a sexy cat shortly before crossing the Delaware, Moses wore a sexy cat costume up to the summit of Sinai. It's overdone. So before you paint on that black whisker-nose, don a skintight leggings-and-tank-top combo, and call it a party, consider embellishing a little. Some ideas, after the jump. 1. Sexy cat during the Great Depression:
One lucky tipster received a special surpise from the Houston Hall SEPTA token machine this weekend. Instead of a real, SEPTA-minted one-ride coin, she instead got a janky laundromat token painted to look legitimate. It remains to be seen whether the faux-ken will work like the real deal, but if you need us, we'll be ordering a gallon of copper paint and collecting nickels.
Yeah, he may have been a pest, but that little furry mofugga managed to eat his way into our heart-trash these past couple weeks. News of his death this past weekend has, simply put, shaken us to our core.
Every so often we stop being stressed and angsty long enough to remember that WOW Penn is so PRETTY! Especially this time of year, when the leaves are passionate and fiery, the buildings sturdy and handsome, and the sky as crisp and blue as the eye of a long-forgotten sailor... Sorry, we got a little fired up just now. Anyway, send your PennPornPics to tips@underthebutton.com, and we will publish the most NSFW.* Get them in ;) by this Saturday, 10/26. *(this is a porn joke, please don't send us dick pics, send us trees.)
Schmear It truck at 41st and Locust RIGHT NOW! Get thee to the bagel truck, before they run out of lox/capers/onions/tomatoes/low-fat-cream-cheese... man, we'll see you there...
Times have changed since we were all wee Pokemon trainers, hoarding colorful cards in plastic sleeves--nay, binders!--to show off to our PokePals. That was a simpler era, when only 151 wild, beautiful Pokemon roamed the land. Now, with the release of X and Y, there are hundreds and hundreds of those little dudes and renewed passion for their craft. Which brings us, finally, to the reason for this post. The class of 2016 Facebook page recently lit up with an enthusiasm that Professor Oak (PKST 001?) would be proud of. While the concept of a University City Pokemon Championship is hilarious, we are SO in. Especially if Brock will be there. He's probably all salt-n'-pepper sexy after so many years.
Wharton needs a dean, fast. How fortuitous--you're looking for a job! So while career services is still buying up iPads, we thought we'd let you in on this job posting on The Economist website. Polish your resumé, iron your OCR blazer, and click here for the full listing. While the unspecified salary is a bummer, we somehow think they'll take good care of you!
Apropos absolutely nothing, here are a couple bizarre things you can find in Urban Outfitters--the number one place to buy things you regret buying almost immediately after buying them-- this week. Come and get it! These "crystals" are only $6 (unless otherwise labeled,) making them a steal, probably. Great for use as magical healing stones, they also double as things to throw at people not as good at interior decorating as you are. One more "gem" after the jump! Whether you grew up in North Jersey or South Jersey, you probably carry your state allegiance close to your heart: your Italian or Jewish heritage, your Uggs, your close personal ties to The Boss. Why not be a little more deliberate in your love for Da Jerz? Bonus points: If you break this charm necklace in half, you and your boyfriend in ZBT can have matching necklaces that complete each other.
Wait, doesn't What's HapPENNing usually happen on Mondays? It's like a Tuesday afternoon, get your shit together. YEAH WELL YESTERDAY WAS A NATIONAL HOLIDAY FOR SOME, and this weekend was fall break, and our bitter tirade is now over.
While reading up on the history of Our Fair City recently, UTB spotted a spurious photo reference. Recognize that pho place? It's definitely the one at 43rd and Spruce, where we nom warm broth, Thai Basil and bean sprouts like it's our job. It's definitely NOT an Old City sidewalk cafe, some 40 blocks away. Even fancy historians make typos!
Penn researchers have done it again, taking something we're pretty sure is the case and confirming it with empirical evidence! This time the subject is everyone's favorite time-waster and stalking tool, Facebook.
And you thought sexual activity only happened in DuBois or the M&T office! It looks like some lucky med student was up all night to get... an A in anatomy...this weekend in the BioMed library. Come to think of it, it might have been the same guy doodling boobs in the carrels. Pants Abandonment: The new test prep.
Shall I compare thee to a Federal Donut? Thou art less fluffy, less incredible Your "Dunkin' Donuts," "Krispy Kreme," your standards--* Compared to these, they seem inedible. A Federal Donut's soft and rich and sweet, It's made by angels working through the night; Without one no hangover is complete, No morning Philly sun can shine so bright. And did we mention there's Fried Chicken too? All coming to a Sansom Street near you.
Midterms are the evil cousin of finals. You don't have demarcated "reading days" for studying, but exams still happen in multiple classes all at once. Don't start weeping into your coffee grinds just yet, undergraduates! Things could be a lot worse. Med School worse.
Hear ye, hear ye! It is on this esteemed date--or possibly tomorrow or the next day--200 years previous, that the first Philomathean donned his first secretive robe in the pursuit of fanciness. While the ritual used to celebrate the birthday is secret, we can only assume it includes wine and bitches.
Happy National Coffee Day! Retailers across campus, including Wawa and Dunkin', are giving away free liquidy alertness today in honor of a somewhat dubious national holiday. Full list here.
Happy Friday, Quakers! The weather's great, midterms are just around the corner, and this Saint Bernard (named Small) is sitting on a bench outside Van Pelt like a person. Aww. Soon they'll be wearing doggy suits and preparing for doggy case interviews!
OCR is intimidating enough for the brave souls who participate. But for those of us who don't dream of going into corporate life, finance or consulting, and who don't even own a suit, it's probably more terrifying. Here are a couple quick tips to keep you informed and calm about your own tenuous link to the real world.