'Expect nothing, appreciate everything' has guided Ruby de Frees' field hockey career since the beginning

Junior goalkeeper Ruby de Frees never thought she would get an offer to play collegiate field hockey — let alone at an Ivy League school.

Her journey started during college applications: As people gradually made their college decisions, de Frees committed late, during the “dead period” of recruiting in June and July. Attending an Ivy League institution was never  her priority. 

“My dad would ask me if I want to email an Ivy school, [and I'd say] 'No, I don’t want to go to an Ivy school,'” de Frees said. 

Eventually, though, Penn became her first choice, and the Quakers reciprocated her feelings. With Penn being her only offer, de Frees was excited to make the most out of it.

However, when she arrived on campus, de Frees was immediately hit with imposter syndrome. 

“I was surprised by the level of competition in academics — I thought I was going to come in the bottom of the barrel,” she said. "I’m keeping up with the academics … which is great, but just very surprising."

Flashback to de Frees' childhood, she grew up in Crofton, Md. and started playing field hockey in kindergarten. De Frees hasn’t looked back since. Her initial attempt at playing as a goalkeeper in second grade was met with hesitancy.

“I saw all of the gear, and no one wanted to do it ... why not," she said. "I did it a couple times. My mom was like, 'Why?’ Because it was just so much gear and you’re playing in the summer,” de Frees said. 

It was a valid concern, but she always kept the position in her mind as she switched between goalkeeping and defense. It was during middle school that she first joined a club and started playing field hockey year-round. When de Frees made the top team of her age group playing goalkeeper, it finally clicked — goalkeeping was the position for her. What started as a casual hobby had turned serious.  

“I was doing well, improving, on a good trajectory, but also just [spending] money doing it as well, [joining] club, signing up for clinics, tournaments, and gear I had to buy. I might as well just take this as far as I can,” de Frees said. 

That drive and sense of purpose have shaped more than just her athletic journey. Community is something de Frees values both on and off the field. Outside of the net, de Frees refers to herself as "that therapist friend everyone has." In the future, she aspires to be a clinical psychologist — or a job that is therapy-oriented. If it merges with her love of sports, even better. 

“I’ve always liked the idea of just being able to help people [in] a one-on-one setting, in a private room, just being that person’s therapist and having a structured way of being able to help someone’s mental well-being,” she said. 

Also outside of classes, de Frees is part of the Student Athlete Advisory Committee, representing the field hockey team. SAAC aims to promote a sense of community among the 33 varsity teams by giving varsity athletes a voice in the athletics department, promoting communication with administrators, as well as discussing NCAA and Ivy League issues. Members also engage in campus- and community-based initiatives, while advocating for student-athlete welfare and a positive image. The close-knit community extending across past and present players is one of her favorite things about Penn field hockey.

“When we played Columbia, I knew their goalie, their coach was a Penn Alum. … everyone knows each other,” she said. 

This season, de Frees recorded 77 saves, notched a .675 save percentage, and sported a 2.24 goals-against average across all 16 games. But whether on the field blocking shots, studying psychology, or hanging out with her teammates — de Frees wants to be someone that people can rely on. 

De Frees turned the uncertainty of sticking with field hockey into an opportunity to expand her community at Penn, and her advice to freshmen beginning their Penn journey is something her old teammate told her.

“Expect nothing, appreciate everything.”