With fifth-year senior quarterback Billy Ragone graduating following this past season, Penn football coach Al Bagnoli has some big shoes to fill.
Ragone, winner of three Ivy League titles throughout his time with the Red and Blue, is a left-handed, veteran quarterback with a knack for both deep throws to his receiving corps who also possesses the ability to step up and run.
For the first several weeks of spring ball, Bagnoli did not know where he would turn as next season’s opening game rapidly approaches. Though Alek Torgersen performed well in relief against Cornell at the end of 2012, Bagnoli was hesitant to hand the reigns of the team to someone who spells “Alex” so weirdly.
Repeatedly, Bagnoli has heaped praise on his former starting quarterback while issuing pleas for a new starting gunslinger.
“Ragone’s been a huge part of our program for the past half-decade, but I was really hoping I could get four more years out of him,” Bagnoli said following Penn’s season-ending loss to the Big Red in November. “I guess we’ll just have to look elsewhere.”
Luckily, it doesn’t seem like Bagnoli will have to wait long for the solution as walk-on William Rogaine showed up on Bagnoli’s doorstep last week. Rogaine, the 23- year-old freshman, is confident that he has the skills necessary to succeed in this program.
“I mean sure, I just started throwing left handed a few weeks ago and I’m not the most mobile guy,” Rogaine said sheepishly while visibly uncomfortable. “But I’m sure I can fit in right where I left off — eh, I mean where Billy left off.”
Rogaine proceeded to stroke his chin, as if searching for a lost beard.
While he found nothing but a clean-shaven face, Rogaine has found his throwing stroke early and often in spring practices, hitting senior wide receiver Conner Scott like he has ... never before?
“We have really good chemistry going,” Scott said. “William and I go way back. It’s almost as if we’ve been playing together for years.”
Bagnoli also mentioned that another walk-on quarterback had shown up to practice around the same time as Rogaine, a man by the name of Brian Pecker.
“Now this guy walked in and said he was ‘Brian Pecker,’” Bagnoli said. “I’m sorry, but anyone who didn’t immediately realize that was Ryan Becker is not seeing straight.”
Becker was sent home immediately after the practice ended.
“I just don’t know what happened, it was probably my lack of distinctive facial hair that did me in,” Becker said. “I think everyone could tell it was a fake beard.”
With the phony removed from practice, operations resumed as normal. Bagnoli feels pretty good about his chances for the next four, or five, years with Rogaine under his wing.
“There’s something about this kid. He’s really just got a championship pedigree to him,” Bagnoli added. “You know he’s been there before and made those big throws when he had to.”
When approached on the possibility of Rogaine actually being Billy Ragone, Bagnoli and the rest of the coaching staff were incredibly confused.
“There’s no way they could be the same person. I mean, have you seen that man’s chin? Completely naked,” Bagnoli said with a perplexed expression on his face. “The real Billy Ragone would never let that happen.”
As of print time, Penn Athletics Communications was too busy with the promotion of Mike Mahoney as Athletic Director to add William Rogaine to the roster.
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