COLUMN: Kicking squirrels won't help, so smile instead

From Ariel Horn's, "Candy from a Stranger," Fall '99 From Ariel Horn's, "Candy from a Stranger," Fall '99Ever been so cranky that you've seen a squirrel happily frolicking in your path and you wanted to kick it and watch its body catapult through the air to land bloody and furry on the dank, cold ground? The Penn catalogue only shows pictures of racially diverse groups of perfect friends having perfect intellectual discussions on perfect sunny days by the Button. But college, more often than not, has its share of less than perfect non-catalogue days. Days when you wake up to find your roommates taking a shower when you want to take a shower. Days when you wake up to the realization that you have a paper due that day that you haven't even started. Days when you're so tired you can barely formulate a sentence, let alone stress to the cafeteria worker who is making your sandwich that "turkey and swiss" really sounds nothing like "tuna and tomato." And the Czar of all Bad Days, the days when the Noodle Man at Hill yells at you for not knowing the specific name of "Udan" noodles. Like it would be that big a deal if he accepted that sometimes people call them "fat noodles." Sure, you could hide in the stacks at Van Pelt and hope that the day ends as quickly as possible. Sure, you could happily accept the B you got on your paper and think, "Wow. I'm so very glad my TA made all these valuable suggestions. Now I can learn to be a better writer and establish my arguments more persuasively! Thanks, Vladimir, you're a-OK!" Sure, you could hook up an IV to pump caffeine into your arm instead of complaining about not getting enough sleep. But most Penn students take the more satisfying route. After all, any fool knows that a bad day doesn't get better by keeping it to yourself. The only way to help a bad mood is to spread it. It's this aggressive disregard for other people's feelings that makes college a scary place to live. (That and the muggings.) We are not only little fish in a big sea, we are irritable piranhas attacking one another's flesh on a daily basis because of our own crappy days and insecurities. It's time for it to stop. Viva la goldfish. We didn't always treat one another like the shower scum in the Quad's bathrooms. In preschool we spent days solely learning "caring." After the riveting "sharing" unit concluded, preschool teachers attempted to show us little tykes how to take care of each other. How to look out for our fellow preschoolers. How to pet the bunny instead of force-feeding him. In short, a layman's guide on how to be nice. But as preschool became a distant memory, the values we were taught slowly slipped out of our consciousness to make way for more relevant information, like economic statistics, facts about art-history images, math formulas and the details of DNA formation. Somehow, being nice to people took a backseat to studying for exams, writing papers and dwelling in our own miserable, overworked, sleep-deprived realities. We close our doors to study without even saying hello to our roommates. We shut people out without even giving them a chance to come in. How ironic -- now that we're in college, most of us would probably fail out of preschool. Maybe it's time to change that. Because no matter how important you think your GPA is, no matter how little sleep you got, no matter how crappy your day is, there is nothing more important than the way we treat one another. That is why in preschool they didn't teach you physics or chemistry first. It's not just about sharing your graham crackers. It's about making an effort to be nice to people even on the worst of days, because that is what life is made of. Not grades, but human kindness. Because you know what? Everybody does poorly on exams. Nobody got enough sleep last night. And complaining about it isn't going to change anything. When you ask someone how their day is going, really listen to their answer. When you're in a rush to get to class, hold the door open for the person behind you even though you don't have time. Say thank you. Appreciate people. Besides, squirrels don't get good trajectory.