LETTERS: An open letter to Penn's males

To the Editor: Sound horrifying? What about the six cars and two men that honked and whistled at me on my morning jog? Or the train conductor that patted my head and said "good girl" as I handed him my ticket on a ride this afternoon? What about my male friend who, just minutes after Take Back the Night, gave me a supportive hug and grabbed my butt? Rape is not a foreign felony unique to "bad neighborhoods" and made for-TV movies. It's everyday words women feel like daggers when men tell them they're weak and dumb. It's disgrace when the only attributes a woman's judged on are the curve of her hips and the size of her bust. It's ears that refuse to listen to a woman's voice. Take Back the Night gives women the chance to be heard. Our community is dominated by men. Just count the fraternities lining Locust Walk. Once again, women are forgotten so men can take the spotlight. One night a year we invite you -- the bright and worldly men of Penn -- to consider a women's perspectives and praise her achievements. One night, you can't ignore our voice and strip us of our dignity. We don't deny that men endure suffering, but the function of Take Back the Night is not to forgive them for inducing ours. It serves, rather, to reveal to women that the oppression they encounter is the disgustingly frequent result of patriarchal society. Violations of women are not a defect in their personality, but a flaw in culture. Crimes against men have different derivations; that's not what this night is about. On April 3, women marched through West Philadelphia, their voices cheering until they ached from all the pent up emotion they're never permitted to express. We were confident, for a moment, that no force could suppress our rights, that no person could diminish our identity. A few of you supported us, gave us our glory, and perhaps even learned something. But those of you who felt excluded? where were you? You haven't earned my applause only if you've never committed rape. If you'd heard Litty Paxton's speech, you'd remember her words, "It's not that simple." It makes my face flame and my insides burn to keep reinforcing our differences. But until cars stop beeping and men stop raping, I'm not convinced of efforts towards understanding one another. I'll make a deal with you, beloved men, I won't judge your gender if you won't assess my worth by my body. I'll listen to you with a fair mind if you'll listen to me. Marissa Engel College '99 Take Back the Night committee member