COLUMN: "From Skylab to MTV"

From Caren Lissner's "Pretty Sneaky Sis," Spring '92. A lot of us don't want to admit that we grew up in the seventies. This recently became apparent to me when, upon turning 21, I tried to reminisce about the good old days. After all, I'm going to have to have stories to tell my kids some day, so it's important to think about what has changed since I was born. I enjoy remembering the seventies, but mentioning this decade to any of my peers causes facial contortions more violent than in any horror movie. Never mind the fact that "American Top 40" is now mainly composed of dance music and remakes of songs from fifteen years ago anyway. Everyone wants to forget their roots and pretend that they have always hated disco, and that they never worshipped John Travolta or watched Norman Lear sitcoms. It's so much better to live in the present, when we have more sophisticated number one songs. Like this week's chart topper, "Too Sexy," for example. I guess the fact that we identify more with the eighties than with the seventies makes sense. We were only in elementary school in the seventies. It's shocking to think that some of us were actually alive during Watergate and Vietnam, but not conscious enough to remember anything about it. The first news event I remember is the Bicentennial Celebration on July 4, 1976. I remember that we went to the pool that day. Learning to swim was more important than watching the news throughout most of the seventies. It was about 1977 that I realized I didn't know what was going on in the world, so I asked my mom why I was being kept in the dark. She answered, "We all are, honey, but just as soon as ConEdison gets the lights back on, we'll be fine." The first year I really became conscious of the news was 1979. This was mainly because I had to be so careful in 1979. If I looked at the solar eclipse I would go blind. If workers at Three Mile Island didn't fix the leak soon, we were driving to Florida. If the government didn't take care of Skylab, we were going to hide under the beds all day in case it dropped on our house. (I swear these were my mother's solutions.) But we're not defined by Skylab or the last total solar eclipse or even Pop Rocks and "Grease." Because we're not the disco generation. We're the MTV generation. According to the adults who put labels on generations, we want everything quick and to the point, like an MTV commercial. I'd like to think that we're sort of in-between, actually. Next year's freshman class is closer to the MTV-microwave-VCR generation than we are. Most people I know have adapted better to MTV than I have. I still think music is meant to be heard and not seen. I couldn't care less what Oxford Valley Cable took away. I guess I'm shaping up to be the grumpy old woman of my generation. My parents used to tell me what life was like when they were young. It seemed pretty glorious. Milk delivery. Knowing your neighbor. Being related to your neighbor. Does our generation have any stories like that? Sure we do. If most of the seventies have been forgotten, I suppose I can find something in the eighties to talk about. I was about ten years old when cable invaded my township. The advent of the new network excited me, because I liked the songs they used in the commercials, including "Centerfold" and "I Love Rock 'n Roll." The novelty wore off quickly, but luckily we had Atari. Of course, we didn't have Nintendo, the game system that keeps my younger step-brother and step-sister inside most of the day instead of playing in the street like my parents did. Actually, the kids are also inside a lot due to the VCR. They both knew how to work a VCR practically from the time they learned to talk. By the time I have kids, my stories of only being able to see a movie once will freak them out entirely. There are a few other things I'll be able to tell them. I'll tell them that phones actually used to ring. I'll also mention that they had dials, and that if you accidentally let go of the dial before pulling it all the way around, you had to dial the whole number over. Remember that? It was actually pretty tough for a little girl with tiny fingers. Perhaps I'll throw in the fact that pay phones only cost a dime. Someone recently told me that in Massachusetts they still cost a dime. I went up there to try to find out why they were so far behind the times. I never did find out, but I did get invited to a McGovern for President rally. I'll tell them about how there were only three networks when I was growing up. There was no Nickelodeon, so the only cartoons were on Saturday. They usually ended by noon, and then you had to watch stuff with real people in it, like "Land of the Lost," which sucked. I'll also discuss the horrors of not having had a Microwave. We had to wait at least 45 minutes to cook anything. And speaking of food, they almost had to cancel Halloween one year. People were afraid that sickos would mimic the person who had put all the poison in Tylenol that year. I went around anyway, and most of the doors had signs on them saying "NO CANDY" or "SORRY, TOO DANGEROUS." My mom didn't let me eat what I collected, so I sold it to a kid named John Basset on the schoolbus the next day. Anyway, that was when they started putting tamper-proof tops on medicine bottles. And I was there to see it happen. One thing that boggles the mind is trying to remember pre-computer times. I remember actually writing ten page papers on a typewriter in high school, and having to use whiteout (a new invention itself) every time I made a mistake! Then there is the symbol of all that is obsolete: the vinyl record. I often find myself stubbornly defending records when others encourage me to move on to smaller and better things. CDs scratch as easily as records, and they don't sound that much clearer, but nobody wants to admit this. Besides, you can get used records for a dollar each. I guess I'll be okay until my needle breaks and I can't get a new one. Our generation has certainly seen major changes, and we probably won't even be aware of all of them until we trip over our kids' history books and notice that there's a page detailing the incredible fact that Germany was once two countries, and that anyone who tried to go from one to the other got shot. It was shocking enough for me to discover recently that oldies stations now play songs from the seventies. The seventies! Can "Centerfold" and "I Love Rock and Roll" be far behind? · Caren Lissner is a junior English major from Old Bridge, New Jersey. Pretty Sneaky Sis appears alternate Fridays.