Authors advocates variety in speech on lesbian sex

Nationally-known author and sex therapist JoAnn Loulan used an interesting example Friday night to illustrate the variety in les - bian circles. "I wouldn't want my fingers in Princess Di's vagina, because she's not my type, but there are many women who would," said Lou - lan, who spoke to a standing-room only crowd in Harrison Auditorium. "Lesbian sex, les - bian tastes and lesbians themselves come in all shapes and sizes." Loulan's stand-up comedian style blended humorous anecdotes and serious statements about lesbian sexuality. After advising lesbians to unplug their vib - rators because a woman in Texas burned down her house after leaving it plugged in, she moved on to one of her main topics -- lesbian gender roles. She said that when she was growing up, she felt uncomfortable because she did not fit into the traditional sexual stereotypes. "I wasn't a boy and I wasn't a girl," she said. She added that it was not until later that she realized she was something different: a lesbian. In the same way, she said, lesbians cate - gorize gender roles within their own com - munity, with labels such as butch and femme. She spoke of a "butch to femme scale" which showed that there were many points in between the two extremes which reflected the entire spectrum of lesbian sex. By recognizing one's place on the scale, lesbians become freer and more comfortable with their sexual identity, she said. "It's crucial for us to talk about sex," she said. Loulan's warm, charismatic style loosened the audience up to the point that when she asked women to rate what they preferred sexually in terms of "doing to her" or "getting done," the audience responded & enthusiastically. She asked the audience members who en - joyed "getting done" 100 percent of the time, and liked "doing" zero percent of the time to stand up. Then she asked those who liked "doing" all the time and did not enjoy "getting done" at all to identify themselves. She then matched up the two groups while the audience cheered and applauded wildly. Loulan added that even though lesbian sex by its very nature implies a "doer" and a "receiver", it does not necessarily mean that one partner has to be active and the other passive. "When I'm being made love to, I'm not passive," she said. "I'm giving the greatest gift I've got to give, next to my heart -- [my vagina]." Loulan touched upon many subjects which affect the lesbian community, such as gay parenting and the role of lesbians within the feminist movement. "Lesbians sold out to the straight feminist movement," she said. "We acted straight and supported them on issues which didn't affect us, like pro-choice, and now what have they done for gay rights?" Despite the concern for gay rights, Loulan did say she was cautiously hopeful for Clin - ton's presidency, especially with Hillary Clin - ton in the White House. "It's nineteen-ninety-fucking-two and this is the first first lady who has a job," she said. Marcie Torfason, from Haddonfield, New Jersey, said after the program that she was very pleased with Loulan. "I think she's great, absolutely terrific," she said. "Not only is she straight up about sex, but she really makes you feel comfortable and good about yourself." Torfason added that although she is a les - bian and has been open about it for almost ten years, most of the time she is uneasy about expressing her sexuality. "I'm not one of those younger exhibitionist types, I'm not going to act lesbian in public," she said. "But I do feel uneasy most of the time and JoAnn is one of the few people who makes the uneasiness go away."