Rina Thomas

There's a massive, non-violent protest going on in our very own backyard. Community leaders are calling for 10,000 men to flood the streets with peacekeeping patrols in an effort to stem the rampant violence. Philadelphia has organized town-watch movements and Father's Day rallies before, but the city has never hosted something of this scale.

We've been called a lot of unflattering things lately. Some call us the millennial generation, a hyper-needy bunch. Put-upon college administrators are forced to acquiesce to our demands for bigger dorm rooms and fancier dining options. Thomas Friedman calls us Generation Q, the quiet Americans.

I left my Negotiations class last week in a rage. I thought about taking on the Locust Walk squirrels in a brawl, but decided that the bloated bottom feeders would probably win. Before any PETA members get up in arms, let me explain. I was provoked by the sight of future bankers behaving badly.

Rina Thomas is a Wharton and College senior from New Orleans. Her e-mail address is thomas@dailypennsylvanian.com. The Gospel According to Thomas appears on Thursdays.

Halloween approaches, and our thoughts turn to wicked things. Vampires, ghouls and . problems in urban planning. Wicked problems are practically indefinable. Issues like poverty, crime, broken infrastructure, failing schools and racism are tangled in a knotted mess.

Every day we dodge and weave past the flyer-laden students on Locust Walk. We turn down offers of cookies, parties, executive-board positions and concerts by unknown artists. Sympathy for the Locust loiterers might impel us to grab a few leaflets before dropping them into the next trash can along the way.

BYOB. Europe does it. America used to do it before the Second World War. African nations may soon join in. So will you if the Philadelphia City Council succeeds in banning plastic bags. It's not that hard. Just bring your own bag when you go shopping. If eco-conscious council members have their way, Philly will soon join the ranks of green cities like San Francisco and Paris.

Way back during my freshman year, a homeless stranger led a couple of my buddies on an epic quest for fried chicken. After wandering around West Philly late at night, they all ended up at Crown's on 40th and Market. Bonhomie flowed forth, and much crispy fowl was consumed.

A war is being waged on hypocrisy. Statesmen will fall, and political empires will crumble. But the adult entertainment industry will live on. Larry Flynt, publisher of Hustler magazine, is billing himself as a crusader in the fight for public integrity. In June this year, he ran a full-page ad in the Washington Post, offering up to $1 million cash to anyone who could "provide documented evidence of illicit sexual or intimate relations with a Congressperson, Senator or other prominent official.

What if you woke up one day with your OPIM professor's face staring down at you? If you decide that non-linear optimization problems are just too much in the morning, the offending academic could be exorcised from your dorm room by a simple touch on the wall.