To sexile or not to sexile, that is the question

I think we can all agree — being sexiled is not fun.

There’s the series of awkward texts from your roommate. There’s coming home to the warning sock — sometimes unwashed — on the door. And worst, there’s the 1 a.m. knock on the door of your compassionate friend with a couch. And the morning-after trek back to your room that looks like the walk of shame that rightfully belongs to your roommate.

That said, being sexiled starts to look pretty appealing compared to its alternative — being included in the party. Or rather, being an unwilling spectator to your roommate’s moment of fun.

If you know what I’m talking about, my sympathies. If you don’t, read on.

Imagine sitting at your desk, pounding out a paper that’s due in less than 24 hours. Your roommate is lounging on her bed, maybe because she’s already finished her midterms and has nothing else to do. Or maybe because — though she didn’t tell you — she’s just texted her boyfriend and he’s coming over for a visit.

When he knocks on the door, she assures you that he’ll just be over for a bit to watch some YouTube videos. You plug in your headphones, crank up your music and get right back to work. But five minutes later, their antics have sent you packing your bags and gunning it to the relative safety of the Riepe library.

Don’t let that happen. Penn loves to party, but roommates’ sex adventures are probably one of the few parties you don’t want to be a part of.

So remember the “exile” part of sexile. Tell your roommate to give you a subtle warning and say the Riepe library is looking rather cozy, rather than letting her X-rated behavior force you to find out the hard way.

And if you’ve already got your privacy, make sure you hold onto it. Locks exists for a reason. So do text messages. And socks can do more than keep your feet warm in the winter.

Be kind, and please, please remember to sexile your roommate.

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