Earlier this month, at the Taipei Zoo, a 46-year-old man named Chen Chung-ho spread the good Christian gospel by attempting to convert some of the zoo's residents -- a pack of African lions. Chung-ho taunted them from behind a fence, before scaling a concrete wall and dropping into the lions' den. He raised his arms and began screaming, "Jesus will save you!" to the heathen lions. Chung-ho then removed his jacket and began waving it around, demanding, "Come bite me!" -- which the large male eventually did.
After biting his arm and ripping his pants, the lion backed off -- to bear false witness against the neighboring penguins, sources say -- while Chung-ho continued to mumble prayers, arms outstretched. Zoo officials tranquilized the lions and took Chung-ho to the hospital. Sources also confirm that the male lion has had several extramarital affairs -- his wife could not be reached for comment, since no one could figure out which one she was.
Religion sure can make people do crazy things -- some sneakier than others. Take our president, for example.
In 2002, George W. Bush announced his plan to appoint David Hager to chair a Food and Drug Administration panel, entitled the Reproductive Health Drug Advisory Committee. The panel evaluates the safety and effectiveness of marketed and investigational drugs, and makes influential recommendations to the FDA. Its most controversial concern is contraceptive drug regulation.
Hager, an obstetrician gynecologist, is the author of two books that have received a lot of attention since his nomination: As Jesus Cared for Women: Restoring Women Then and Now, and Stress and the Woman's Body, which emphasizes the medical benefits of the "power of Jesus Christ in one's life" and suggests specific Scripture readings and prayers to help with headaches and premenstrual syndrome. Unidentified sources reported that Hager was unwilling to prescribe contraceptives to unmarried women, according to Time magazine, though Hager has denied this.
Hager's most significant bias is his vehement anti-abortion views. At one time, he served as the spokesman for a group that petitioned the FDA to rescind its approval of the abortion pill RU-486, in conjunction with the Christian Medical Association.
The media attention lavished on Hager's religious and conservative views may have been the reason that the chair position of the committee was given to another, female physician, and Hager was offered a regular committee member position. Now that Hager has been asked to renew his service, the controversy has been sparked once more. During his participation, he has indeed voted against approving non-prescription emergency contraceptive levonorgestrel, trademarked as Plan B. His was one of 4 out of 28 votes against the drug.
In the dismal aftermath of the election, taking my birth control pill was the highlight of my day -- my own personal protection against the threat imposed by four more years of an anti-abortion rights presidency. Now, it seems like an assault on all sides, even on contraception, to have a man like Hager appointed chairman of what is supposed to be an unbiased, purely scientific committee.
Have Hager's religious beliefs affected his judgment? Hager defended himself, saying in The Washington Post, "I believe that I offer the ability to objectively evaluate data and arrive at sound decisions based on that information." Pro-abortion rights activists are saying he's an unqualified religious hack, and anti-abortion advocates shout back that he is a God-fearing Christian hero.
It's possible that he is not quite either. Hager has won several awards and was named one of the best physicians for women by Good Housekeeping -- not an award given to doctors discovered trying to convert their tongue depressors in the examination room. RU-486 is suspected to have contributed to at least three deaths and caused 676 adverse reactions. Perhaps Hager's reservations about the drug were scientifically based.
Nevertheless, it can't be a mistake that Bush endorsed such a staunch advocate of the anti-abortion agenda for a chair position. Hager has been used by all sides as a political tool, but Bush's placement of him as committee chairman is the most slick, a blatant appeal to his anti-abortion rights supporters. A quiet attack on the right to choose.
Contraceptive measures should never, ever be denied to women, as long as they are safe. It is Hager's job to determine this, and it's possible that when he shows up to committee meetings, he leaves his religious rhetoric at home. Let's not be na*ve -- his books may be a little crazy, his abortion views downright wacky, but if he is qualified and fair in his votes, he should be allowed to stay.
But the moment -- the nanosecond -- he shows any signs of undermining women's right to the reproductive drugs we need, just to pander to his religious, anti-abortion support base, he should be thrown without hesitation to the lions.
Jessica Lussenhop is a senior English major from St. Paul, Minn. Textual Revolution appears on Fridays.
