PrognostiQuakers: Week 7

So, it's that time of year again.

While we PrognostiQuakers detest the awful presence that will be on our campus tomorrow, we do know one thing that playing against Princeton is good for...

Another Quakers win.

Mystical wizardry is not required to see what will happen tomorrow on 33rd Street.

Indeed, when a team has beaten only the lowly Lions of Columbia, what else can we expect but another drubbing?

So, on our weekly quest for knowledge and excitement, we PrognostiQuakers set out on another jaunt through the vast beauties of America.

That done, we returned to Philadelphia, ready for the only day of the year that it's acceptable to display orange and black.

We're not afraid to admit that we went trick-or-treating on Wednesday night. After all these years, we know full well what keeps us going.

But, since they don't give out beer on Halloween, we were more than willing to settle for candy.

Walking down Walnut Street, our hands outstretched in beggary for something to indulge our sweet tooth, we saw Penn's new secret weapon.

As this weapon used to be one of our own, we could not have been prouder.

Judith Rodin, our University's president, but more importantly, a former carpet rider, was all decked out in a No. 66 jersey.

We're not quite sure how the Quakers plan to use their new middle-aged wonder, but we are sure that the results will be disastrous or worse for the College of New Jersey and its pitiful Pussy Cats.

We're not even sure if El Presidente, who will be listed as "J. S. Rodin" on this week's roster, has any college eligibility remaining.

We do know, however, why she has exercised executive power to bump offensive lineman Randy Parker from the Penn 11 -- she is trying to right a grievous wrong.

We remember it well. The date was Sept. 24, 1999. Her pick was "Villanova 21, Penn 13."

So now, two years after her most sinful transgression against the University during her tenure, the Prez is going to make up for it.

In the interest of Princeton's imminent defeat remaining imminent, we will refrain from trying to guess at how Penn's new player will factor into tomorrow's Homecoming game.

We will, however, gloat all afternoon, and be thankful that the Pussy Cats will not be back at Franklin Field until 2003.

Penn 66, Coll. of New Jersey 0.

Please note All comments are eligible for publication in The Daily Pennsylvanian.