Quick Flicks: On the Line

Let me get straight to the point on this one: On the Line is ridiculous and lame. The premise of the "plot"--and I mean this in the loosest sense of the term--is a guy (Lance Bass from *N Sync) who meets the girl of his dreams on the El train but chokes on asking for her name or number. In a moment any good stalker would be proud of, he decides that from the five-minute conversation they had shared on the train, she is "the one." (Bear in mind that one of the clinching factors in this was her ability to recite all the presidents of the United States in chronological order. Hmmm.) He proceeds to put posters around Chicago asking her to call him... blah blah blah... Who really cares? It's awful, and not even the sight of Al Green fully decked out in a gold suit can save the film from its vileness.