GUEST COLUMNIST: No excuse for domestic violence

When was the last time you saw a bumper sticker on a police car? Never? Well, look again. Every car in the Division of Public Safety's fleet has a bold, colorful message on its rear bumper: THERE'S NO EXCUSE FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE! Today is "Work to End Domestic Violence Day," part of National Domestic Violence Prevention Month. It is time to reflect on the many ways domestic violence impacts our friends and family members, our neighbors and our colleagues at the University. Some call it relationship violence or dating violence or, simply, "the abuse." Some, silenced by stigma or fear, refuse to label or identify this devastating problem at all. Domestic violence is a pattern of assaultive and coercive behaviors, including physical, sexual and psychological attacks, that adults or adolescents use against their intimate partners. The pattern of abuse can progress very slowly, making it hard to recognize in the early stages. Battered women consistently report that the abuse gets worse over time. Batterers use different methods of control at different times, forming a distinct and effective pattern of control. As the abuse and isolation grow, the victim's level of fear and danger increase. The later stages of abuse are more easily recognized by those willing to see: bruises, broken bones, burned flesh. Homicides. Nationally, nearly four million women are physically abused by their boyfriends or husbands every year. In Philadelphia, one out of four women has reported being physically abused by an intimate partner at some point in their lives. And 42 percent of female homicide victims nationwide are killed by the men who promised to love them. Grassroots organizing over the last 20 years has resulted in more than 1,700 domestic violence programs across the country. Yet the violence continues despite these valuable services. The legal system has made progress in taking domestic violence seriously and imposing criminal sanctions, and yet the violence continues. Why? While surveys show that most people today are willing to say that domestic violence is wrong, the cultural climate still permits domestic violence to continue, with corrosive and often lethal consequences. Social sanctions against domestic violence, in addition to legal sanctions, must be imposed. Until effective social sanctions are developed and woven into the everyday fabric of life in our communities, we will not make significant progress in reducing or preventing domestic violence. If you are in an abusive relationship, Penn has resources that can help. Do not allow your abuser to convince you that it's not abuse, that you are overreacting or are crazy. For students and employees, Special Services in Public Safety and the Penn Women's Center can provide direct assistance and appropriate referrals. Counseling is also available: students can seek confidential services at CAPS (Counseling and Psychological Services), while employees can contact PennFriends, the University's Employee Assistance Program. In addition, there are local domestic violence agencies in Philadelphia and the surrounding communities who want to help you. For more information, pick up a brochure on College Green or call one of the offices mentioned above.