I know what you're thinking. After the release of a college fantasy football game that uses the real names of student-athletes, what else can we do to make a profit off the blood and sweat of unpaid college kids?
With that, the second-annual Penn football official bettors' guide is here to advise you in all of your Ivy League football gambling endeavors.
Jekyll and Hyde
The toughest part about betting on the Quakers - and perhaps a reason to avoid the practice altogether - is that their performance has been incredibly erratic over the past several years, from week to week and even from quarter to quarter.
Take, for example, last season's game at Villanova. Penn jumped out to a 14-10 lead at halftime only to get shut out in the second half, 24-0, by the Wildcats.
Then, after taking an undefeated Yale team down to the wire in a three-overtime game at home - exceeding fans' expectations - the Quakers turned in a lousy performance at Brown the following week.
And after stumbling once more in a 23-7 loss at Harvard, Penn closed out the season by trouncing Cornell, 45-9.
Bottom line: Any time you bet on a game involving Penn, you're taking a big risk.
Wildcat revenge?
If you feel the need to place a bet this Saturday, keep in mind the following three things.
One, Penn hasn't beaten Villanova since 1911, and the Quakers got off to a very slow, 0-3 start last season.
Two, the Wildcats have two games under their belts, including one against West Virginia, while Penn's potential starting quarterback has never played a single down of Division I football.
Three, the last three contests between Penn and Villanova at Franklin Field have been decided in the games' final plays.
Bottom line: I like Villanova, the clear favorite, to win, but Penn will keep it close and cover any spread.
Over/Under
Though Penn struggled quite a bit last season, it scored an average of 23.1 points and held its opponents to an average of 19.3. The disparity was the result of a very strong defensive unit and an offense that feasted on poor run defenses.
This season, despite the graduation of Joe Anastasio and Naheem Harris, Penn's defense will be strong, boasting perhaps the best secondary in the Ivy League.
The offense, however, is full of question marks, most glaringly at quarterback. And while Michael DiMaggio and Bradford Blackmon showed a lot of promise out of the backfield last season, they both have huge shoes to fill after the graduation of standout running back Joe Sandberg.
In fact, Penn averaged only 12 more yards per game through the air last season than it did on the ground.
Bottom line: The Quakers' defense will perform very well; the offense is still a mystery. When in doubt, expect Penn to be a part of a low-scoring affair and take the under.
Prop bets
If you're looking for some interesting prop bets or side bets with your friends, consider the following.
After all of the kicking troubles with Derek Zoch two seasons ago, Penn converted a perfect 30 of 30 extra points last season with then-freshman Andrew Samson (Zoch booted one of those 30 in the season finale against Cornell). Will Samson have another perfect season of PATs? I'd bet on it.
As a defense, Penn racked up 16 interceptions last season, but not a single one of them was returned for a touchdown. I put my money on Chris Wynn taking one to the house this season.
I'm not sure what went on in the locker room during half time of last season's games, but the Quakers consistently followed up their best scoring quarter - the second - with their worst.
The Red and Blue scored 65 points and held the opposition to 27 in the second last season, but they scored only 31 third-quarter points and gave up 47. Defensively, it got even worse in the fourth quarter; Penn gave up 61 total points in the final frame. If you're betting on scoring by the half, take Penn in the first half and the opposition in the second.
