JOKE ISSUE/CAMPUS CRIME REPORT: Wednesday, April 7, 1999

Liquor Law ViolationLiquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said. Liquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.RobberyLiquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.Robbery· April 5 -- A SpectaGuard at Steinberg-Dietrich Hall reported that about 500 College of Arts and Sciences students rushed into the building and removed the school's 89 computers at about 1:30 a.m. The guard said the students were yelling "These computers aren't Wharton's anymore!" as they ran in and out of the building. One Wharton student who was in the building at the time reported that a College student called him a "weenie" during the robbery. Liquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.Robbery· April 5 -- A SpectaGuard at Steinberg-Dietrich Hall reported that about 500 College of Arts and Sciences students rushed into the building and removed the school's 89 computers at about 1:30 a.m. The guard said the students were yelling "These computers aren't Wharton's anymore!" as they ran in and out of the building. One Wharton student who was in the building at the time reported that a College student called him a "weenie" during the robbery.TheftLiquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.Robbery· April 5 -- A SpectaGuard at Steinberg-Dietrich Hall reported that about 500 College of Arts and Sciences students rushed into the building and removed the school's 89 computers at about 1:30 a.m. The guard said the students were yelling "These computers aren't Wharton's anymore!" as they ran in and out of the building. One Wharton student who was in the building at the time reported that a College student called him a "weenie" during the robbery.Theft· All semester -- An employee of The Daily Pennsylvanian at 4015 Walnut Street reported that her entire supply of homemade cream savers candy had been stolen. DP staffers Nic Denman, a high roller from Philadelphia, and Danny Tenenblatt, of the Watts district of Los Angeles, were arrested and taken to the Philadelphia Police Department's 18th District bureau at 55th and Pine streets. Liquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.Robbery· April 5 -- A SpectaGuard at Steinberg-Dietrich Hall reported that about 500 College of Arts and Sciences students rushed into the building and removed the school's 89 computers at about 1:30 a.m. The guard said the students were yelling "These computers aren't Wharton's anymore!" as they ran in and out of the building. One Wharton student who was in the building at the time reported that a College student called him a "weenie" during the robbery.Theft· All semester -- An employee of The Daily Pennsylvanian at 4015 Walnut Street reported that her entire supply of homemade cream savers candy had been stolen. DP staffers Nic Denman, a high roller from Philadelphia, and Danny Tenenblatt, of the Watts district of Los Angeles, were arrested and taken to the Philadelphia Police Department's 18th District bureau at 55th and Pine streets.Nothing elseLiquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.Robbery· April 5 -- A SpectaGuard at Steinberg-Dietrich Hall reported that about 500 College of Arts and Sciences students rushed into the building and removed the school's 89 computers at about 1:30 a.m. The guard said the students were yelling "These computers aren't Wharton's anymore!" as they ran in and out of the building. One Wharton student who was in the building at the time reported that a College student called him a "weenie" during the robbery.Theft· All semester -- An employee of The Daily Pennsylvanian at 4015 Walnut Street reported that her entire supply of homemade cream savers candy had been stolen. DP staffers Nic Denman, a high roller from Philadelphia, and Danny Tenenblatt, of the Watts district of Los Angeles, were arrested and taken to the Philadelphia Police Department's 18th District bureau at 55th and Pine streets.Nothing else· All year -- There's nothing else to report. Yes, that's right. Two years ago the DP crime reporter got to write about dozens of armed robberies every week. Now we're lucky to get a flim-flam. Liquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.Robbery· April 5 -- A SpectaGuard at Steinberg-Dietrich Hall reported that about 500 College of Arts and Sciences students rushed into the building and removed the school's 89 computers at about 1:30 a.m. The guard said the students were yelling "These computers aren't Wharton's anymore!" as they ran in and out of the building. One Wharton student who was in the building at the time reported that a College student called him a "weenie" during the robbery.Theft· All semester -- An employee of The Daily Pennsylvanian at 4015 Walnut Street reported that her entire supply of homemade cream savers candy had been stolen. DP staffers Nic Denman, a high roller from Philadelphia, and Danny Tenenblatt, of the Watts district of Los Angeles, were arrested and taken to the Philadelphia Police Department's 18th District bureau at 55th and Pine streets.Nothing else· All year -- There's nothing else to report. Yes, that's right. Two years ago the DP crime reporter got to write about dozens of armed robberies every week. Now we're lucky to get a flim-flam.All information was taken illegally from the University Police's incident reports, which apparently we aren't allowed to look at. Oops. Liquor Law Violation· April 5 -- A Penn Police officer reported that he came across several intoxicated University officials, including University President Judith Rodin, Provost Robert Barchi and Executive Vice President John Fry, walking on Locust Walk drinking from open containers of Jack Daniels at approximately 3 a.m. Although all of the individuals were of age, the officer arrested them for having open containers of alcohol in public. Only Rodin resisted arrest, spitting at the officer and calling him a "meany head tattle tale," the officer said.Robbery· April 5 -- A SpectaGuard at Steinberg-Dietrich Hall reported that about 500 College of Arts and Sciences students rushed into the building and removed the school's 89 computers at about 1:30 a.m. The guard said the students were yelling "These computers aren't Wharton's anymore!" as they ran in and out of the building. One Wharton student who was in the building at the time reported that a College student called him a "weenie" during the robbery.Theft· All semester -- An employee of The Daily Pennsylvanian at 4015 Walnut Street reported that her entire supply of homemade cream savers candy had been stolen. DP staffers Nic Denman, a high roller from Philadelphia, and Danny Tenenblatt, of the Watts district of Los Angeles, were arrested and taken to the Philadelphia Police Department's 18th District bureau at 55th and Pine streets.Nothing else· All year -- There's nothing else to report. Yes, that's right. Two years ago the DP crime reporter got to write about dozens of armed robberies every week. Now we're lucky to get a flim-flam.All information was taken illegally from the University Police's incident reports, which apparently we aren't allowed to look at. Oops.-- The Notorious B.I.G. and Buffy the Vampire Slayer