DP Swamis

Although we Swamis are ea gerly awaiting the release of Showgirls, we are fully aware our profession is prognostication, not the earthly pleasure of the lap dance. Distracted as we may be, it's time to focus and dust off our turbans after a long, hot summer. It's been a long vacation, but we Swamis still find time in our busy social schedule to serve you, the general public and Maryland quarterbacks around the world, with our infinite wisdom. To begin the new year, we boarded our magic carpets and consulted two experts in our field of forecast. First, we journeyed to the Taj Majal of metropolitan suburbia, lovely Long Island. Upon parallel parking our carpets, we sought out our coveted prize – the sultan of unwavering commitment, red-shirt extraordinaire Rob Hodgson. When we reached the Hodgson household, his parents didn't quite seem to know his whereabouts. "I don't know where he is?let me get him," Bob Sr. said. We Swamis had suspected he'd gone out to see a sneak preview of that stinkin' Showgirls flick, but after searching the Long Island shopping mall circuit, we found a sobbing Robby shooting free throws in a playground. Well aware that Showgirls doesn't make its official debut till later this evening, we Swamis approached the young impressionable lad and asked him to join our flock. With a new lease on life, Rob took a stand and actually offered us his selections. Little does Robby know that he just violated an NCAA gambling regulation, which could and will render him ineligible should he choose to attend Rutgers. So we guess Rob, in the end, there only is one choice – UNLV. We were very impressed with his Penn 54, Dartmouth 7 offering. Being a New York native he was smart enough not to place any faith in SUNY Ithaca, but still demonstrated the lasting effects of the Hodgson strand of fickle cell anemia with his SUNY Harlem selection. The only time Columbia and shut out belong in the same phrase is when speaking of pretty women in the most recent Playboy issue. We then attempted to consult the psychic friends network, but Dionne Warwick was worried about her remaining eligibility. With only more year of eligibility on the fabled lightweight football squad, crazy legs D. thought it best that we defer to one of her subordinates. Instead of offering us football predictions, they offered us Swamis free passes to Showgirls. Not too bad for the first week of the year. Remember, we're just getting warmed up.