COLUMN: Penn's $25,000-a-year Playground: Enjoy it while you can

From Corin Brown's "The Ugly Stick Chronicles," Fall '94 From Corin Brown's "The Ugly Stick Chronicles," Fall '94The party to end all parties is, of course, Mardi Gras. Me: . . . Yea, so you guys takin' it easy down there? Reveler: (Laughter) Good one. We haven't come up for air since our plane touched down Friday. Me: Yea, so give me the highlights. Reveler: Dude, it is utter fucking mayhem down here! The only thing you can get arrested for down here is pissing in the streets. Me: Sounds pretty sweet. Anyone hook up down there? Reveler: No way man, its not that type of scene. All people are doing is going to bars, taking their drinks outside, and cruising up and down Bourbon Street bartering their beads for sexual favors. There's a super cool vibe down here, man. Everyone's just cuttin' loose, no worries. We all miss you down here, man. Me: Yea, it sounds pretty crazy but some of us can't afford the slackitude it costs to trade beads in New Orleans while ditchin' school. Reveler: Yea bro, hard times. . . Hey, how's it comin' on those reservations for Padre? Me: We're all set. I took care of them Friday. Man, how sweet is that for you guys, Mardi Gras and South Padre, two fat vacations all in one month. Reveler: No shit dude, college is one big vacation ... INSPIRATION! The words "... college is one big vacation ..." were suspended in my mind like the mobile dangling over my baby sister's crib at home. After I hung up with my winsome comrade I pondered more deeply his half-hearted proclamation, made under his breath. Is college indeed a vacation compared to the lives of college graduates? Hmm ... Is college a vacation? Are you kidding me? Damn straight it's a vacation! If you stop to analyze the life of the average Penn student, not to mention the average American college student (University of Arizona, University of Miami, etc.), compared to the life of the average working professional with a college degree, you're going to find yourself referring to Penn as Disney World and you're going to start thinking that your stay at the Quad was like a weekend at the Four Seasons. What do we need Mardi Gras and South Padre for? We have college. I talk to friends of mine who graduated within the last couple of years and they moan about their 80-100 hour a week jobs, their two weeks of vacation a year, no sleep, no social life and no fun. And I think about Penn: 10-20 hours of class a week, my earliest class at 10 A.M. and four months of vacation. Now who's got the better deal? I try to commiserate with these professional friends of mine. I really do. I try to pump them by reminding them of their hefty paychecks and the glamour of living in fancy towns like Manhattan, but they quickly retort with horror stories about the I.R.S. and its 40% and the fact that they haven't gone out in a month And I observe friends who are currently seniors bucking for such jobs or headed for other equally gruelling futures. And I watch these people in their final semester at college rage like they haven't raged since first semester freshman year. These seniors sense the end is near. They see the ominous clouds of post-graduation life slowly encroaching on their college careers. And they are trying to squeeze every last ounce of collegiate party fun in between interviews on Wall Street and filling out Law School applications. I admit that at college there is, indeed, work to be done. But while the specter of the scholastic preparation for our post graduation lives looms over all of us undergrads we should all try to keep in mind that we are still young and unwise to the ways of the post-graduation world. None of us can sufficiently comprehend life in such a world until we leave the friendly confines of our hallowed institution for good. We should try to remember that while much of what the college student does is in preparation for the future, equally much of what the college student does is not tethered to any sort of reality. What's more, it shouldn't be. I am not making a call to arms for the slacker nation, whatever the size of its membership. I am not calling for every student to instantaneously drop every notion of academia forever. I am only making a suggestion that college students, and Penn students in particular, should not take themselves too seriously during their stay at our venerable Ivy League institution. Although I don't know for sure, I think it is safe to say that there is much in life after college that sucks. Just ask those who have left. Although as they grow older they are satisfied with their present lot in life, most of them hold fond memories of their college years and wish, to some degree, they could have them back. I do wish I could have made it to Mardi Gras this week. I too have to prepare for life after Penn, though. But I'll spend my spring break at Padre, the rest of my spare time at Penn, and the rest of my spare time forever trying to be as much of a maniac as I can. I don't care what the rest of you do but I'm going to have a good time. Corin Brown is junior Political Science major from Newton, Massachusetts. The Ugly Stick Chronicles appears alternate Thursdays.