Those of you with the dedication to get up early enough to watch this summer’s World Cup games in South Africa have probably noticed one common thread in every game, showing up in virtually every super-slow mo camera shot ESPN has to offer.
No, not the absurd cry-baby antics of players looking for a free kick (though that does happen a lot). This is much worse: The dreaded faux-hawk.
We can thank one man for the emergence of this not-quite-punk-rocker euro-chic head of hair: David Beckham. Since the 2002 Cup players have been gelling it like Beckham to the point (pun intended!) of absurdity.
There are a few exceptions. USA star Landon Donovan, for example, has such a receding hairline that he couldn’t do-the-do if he wanted.
But with Beckham off the pitch (except England couldn’t really get rid of him) it’s time this fad goes the way of the Segway, another 2002 phenomenon.
Think of all the hair gel that could be saved. During Monday’s Italy-Paraguay match, faux-hawks on both sides stayed crisp despite pouring rain through the entire 90 minutes.
That’s a lotta mousse.
There’s one saving grace here. American’s have such apathy toward soccer, they’ll never even notice. So while another generation of Europeans will have to deal with the faux full-time, we only have to see it every four years.
The faux-hawk flying world of professional soccer does have one thing going — they all have exceedingly beautiful wives.
Excuse me while I buy some gel.
CALDER SILCOX is a rising junior science, technology and society major from Washington, D.C., and is Sports Editor of The Daily Pennsylvanian. His e-mail address is silcox@dailypennsylvanian.com.
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