Ivy League admissions officials announced yesterday that they will consider students' Facebook.com profiles when making admissions decisions.
The policy will take effect beginning next fall, representatives from the Ancient Eight said in a joint press conference.
Several other top schools, including Stanford University and the University of Chicago, will also utilize the popular social-networking site to evaluate applicants.
Penn Dean of Admissions Lee Stetson said the decision stems from admissions officers' current inability to distinguish between similar applicants.
"Facebook answers the tough question of 'What sets you apart from every other Asian or Jew in New Jersey who wants to save the world?'" Stetson said. "Especially since we'll be using the Common Application next year, it just seems like the attack of the clones."
Stetson said that each Ivy will assess accounts on Facebook profiles by using criteria that are specific to each school.
For example, he said, students pictured flaunting plastic red cups would not be favored by Chicago -- where admissions officials admit that fun goes to die -- but may be deemed "a good fit" for Penn.
Similarly, Stetson said the University will favor applicants pictured wearing Ugg boots with mini-skirts or double popped collars.
He added that students who are members of groups like "My Dream is to Have Sex Under the Button" will receive legacy status.
Facebook profiles reveal more about students' characters than do the 217th pages of their autobiographies, Yale University Director of Admissions Jeff Brenzel said.
"For example, I hear this guy has a girlfriend, but he lists himself as single. That's just shady -- definitely not Elis material," Brenzel said. "And we can afford to reject this kind of human scum. We're becoming so selective, next year we're not accepting anybody."
The new policy has already induced panic among high school students.
"I had to change my favorite book to The Autobiography of Ben Franklin and add minority-culture curricula to my interests," said Coco Pough, a junior at Lower Merion High School. "My friends and I pay each other to write comments on our walls like 'Thanks 4 developing those medicines that saved my life : )' and 'i know u r gonna employ Franklin's vision of a life of business and public service 4eva!'"
Unrelatedly, Stetson recently created his own account.
He prides himself on gaining 50,342 high school Facebook friends today, a 12.3-percent increase from this time yesterday that leaves the Princeton University dean of admissions' 43,782 friends in the dust.
"I am a bit concerned that a few of my newfound friends confused me with Penn State admissions," he noted dolefully.
Still, he is proud of the achievement.
"This is more evidence that Penn's star is rising so fast, it might explode," Stetson said.
Facebook me, Penn - Admissions officers will look at student profiles when deciding on acceptances - Dean of Admissions Lee Stetson recommends that students seeking admission to the University include pictures of themselves in Ugg boots and aviators
