Julia Gottlieb: Behind drawn curtains

What would cause five scholastically serious women to drop their books on a Tuesday night? Unfortunately, it has something to do with that fact that the sophisticated, collegiate residents of my house have something in common with thousands of screaming preteens.

No, I'm not talking about a penchant for moody behavior. I'll give you some hints -- he started out on Star Search, had a guest stint on The Bold and the Beautiful and you can hear him saying "you don't have to call" incessantly on the radio.

Okay, so none of us made it to Usher's last concert at the Tweeter Center, but had tickets been cheaper, we would have. You think I'm kidding? When one of his videos comes on the television at my house, normal life comes to a halt and there is a mandatory mini-dance session accompanied by an Usher fan club meeting. It's so embarrassing that we often have to pull the shades.

Many call me a music major gone bad, even when I try to highlight the brevity of our club meetings. But let me defend myself -- not all pop artists grab my attention. I know they're just hyper-marketed industry products.

So what is it about Usher's far-from-innovative pop style that draws me to the TV like a freshman to a frat party? Originally from Chattanooga, Tenn., Usher is set apart by what I like to call the cheese factor. As if being "Usher the fourth" isn't enough, look at his formulaic music videos: man loses woman, sings about it for a while and then dances in the rain (sans shirt, of course). Honestly, with the exception of his "I Need a Girl" video, Usher is always wet and topless. I often think he could get a job at The Cave, Philadelphia's all-male review.

And when he's not topless, he's wearing a signature clothing style. A giant hood-ornament sized "U" necklace always adorns his neck, and he sometimes accessorizes with a leather glove on just one hand, and -- of course -- sunglasses.

To be fair, other pop stars like the boys of *NSync often don similar outfits. But Usher avoids any sort of early Michael Jackson bad boy feel. Anyone with a recurring role on Moesha or teen movies like She's All That just can't be too threatening.

Along with many other Star Search alums, Usher is simply the perfect blend of absurdity and catchy tunes. The seriousness with which he takes himself always leaves me chuckling -- how could anyone honestly believe titling an album U Got It Bad is witty?

And, if that isn't enough, look at his video duet with Sean "Puffy" Combs. While P. Diddy searches for "a girl that could stand me, raise me a family," Usher lovingly sighs, "I need a girl to make my wife."

Meanwhile, scantily clad gyrating women surround the two pop stars. Of course skinny, semi-naked women with fake breasts make the most compassionate life partners -- it only makes sense.

But, in the end, his pop beats, sharp dance moves and warm smile sneak something past my sardonic side and allow me -- and my all housemates -- to dance with Usher while we laugh at him. Since the star reportedly charges his dancers $10 for every mistake, you know it's a tight routine. And of course, we're happy he can't see us in our living room.

Sure, there are better things five intelligent women could be watching. But there is just something about listening to "My Way" and doing sock-footed slides across the linoleum kitchen floor makes for a stress-relieving study break.

Sometimes it's just nice to feel 12 years old again.

Julia Gottlieb is a senior English and Music major from Lancaster, Pa.

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