COLUMN: Men Must Be Responsible

From Chris Iorillo's "The Buck Stops Now," Fall '95 A National Institute of Mental Health study of 32 universities reported that one out of four women will be the victim of rape or attempted rape by the time they graduate from college. One to ten percent of these rapes will be reported and of these, only one percent will be successfully prosecuted. Rape and the culture which supports it has forced women to adjust their lives to accommodate the justifiable fear of sexual assault. Few women feel comfortable walking alone after dark, most carry mace and self-defense courses have practically become a requirement before going to college. Even though many women will not become victims and most men will not become rapists, sexual harassment and violence are so entrenched in modern society that the relationship between the sexes has been dramatically corrupted. Trust is hard-earned in current male-female relationships as a result of the pervasive suspicion that any man could be a potential rapist. It is impossible to discern a rapist from a non-rapist based on appearance alone as looks can certainly be deceiving. In fact, 84 percent of women who were raped knew their attacker and 57 percent of rapes took place on seemingly normal dates. But whose problem is rape? Despite the fact that the overwhelming majority of sexual violence affects women, sexual harassment and assault are male problems. Rape is a male problem because heterosexual men commit 98 percent of all rapes. Rape is a male problem because men, both hetero- and homosexual, are the victims in 10 percent of all rapes. And rape is a problem for all males because when a family member, friend or partner survives an assault, her perception of all men changes dramatically. The man who is not a rapist can find himself rejected by the closest friend who has survived a sexual assault. The perpetrators of sexual harassment and assault have charged men who don't rape with proving their trustworthiness. The frustration a man feels after having a good-intentioned offer of a walk home fearfully rejected, the confusion a man feels watching a woman change her route to avoid crossing his path when walking home late at night, and the tension which fills the air when he enters an elevator occupied by a lone woman are all the result of lost trust between men and women living in a rape-supportive culture. The powerful emotions men often feel from being stereotyped, misunderstood and even feared are usually channeled into anger. Yet anger serves only to exacerbate the problem. Rape is more of a problem for the man who does not rape because he is enraged at men who assault the women he knows and is frustrated by women who may be suspicious of him based on their own experiences. But what more can a man who does not rape do? Isn't continuing to not rape the limit of his power? While the maxim, "Rape will end when men stop raping" implies that only men who rape need to address the problem, the saying, "If you're not a part of the solution, you're a part of the problem" is nowhere more applicable than to men who don't rape. The patriarchal nature of our society encourages rape-supportive behavior. Ninety-one percent of men surveyed said they liked to dominate women and enjoyed the "conquest part" of sex. Fifty-nine percent believe women provoke rape by their appearance and/or behavior. Male promiscuity is more often than not revered by other males. The success of a relationship is frequently judged by the speed with which the man progresses through the sexual "bases." And it is the rare male who, after listening to a tale of sexual conquest, dares to ask if the act was consensual. The social infrastructure of male dominance has made it difficult for men to rebel against the classic image of a man who scores frequently without enduring the ridicule of male peers. The man who bravely denounces these ideals must confront a torrent of homophobic epithets from those whose training to be a man included a lesson in dominance over women. Collectively, men have the power to end rape -- especially men who do not rape. Were men to become as large a part of the solution to rape as they are part of the problem, the incidence of rape would undoubtedly drop. But by doing nothing to change the accepted expressions of masculinity which encourage sexual harassment and violence, men who consider themselves incapable of affecting the problem indirectly affirm the actions of men who do commit these acts. The anti-rape movement was begun by women and is supported almost entirely by women today. In recent years, however, it has seen increasing support from men. As men begin to realize that a world without sexual violence is healthier, easier and quite simply better for them, they are living up to their responsibility. Support groups, education programs, speakouts and changes in personal behavior all contribute to increasing awareness of the role men should assume in promoting understanding of the problem and empathy for the survivors. Our University is home to Students Together Against Acquaintance Rape (S.T.A.A.R.), one of the most respected and outstanding peer education programs in the country. S.T.A.A.R. is currently leading the campaign to find "The Real Men of Penn." Ten male leaders from all aspects of the University will be given the opportunity to express their views on how sexual violence affects our community and how it can be prevented. (Applications are available in the Peer Health Education Office in Houston Hall 310 or nominations can be made by calling 573-3525 until March 17). The "Real Men of Penn" campaign is the perfect chance for male leaders at the University to fulfill their inherent obligation to promote positive social change. Anyone, from an athlete to fraternity President, should apply or nominate others who would take full advantage of an excellent opportunity to voice their opinion on these issues. The cycle of behavior supporting sexual harassment and assault can be stopped. Men who rape do so for power. It is the responsibility of men who do not rape to support the social remodeling necessary to empower the anti-rape movement. Until these men choose to act, not only will their friends, families and lovers continue to be victimized, but the divide between the sexes will only grow deeper. Chris Iorillo is a senior history major from Los Angeles, Calif. "The Buck Stops Now" appears alternate Tuesdays.