COLUMN: "Headed for Law School, Two Columnist's Discuss the Profession"

From Brian Newberry's "A Thousand Words," Fall '92From Brian Newberry's "A Thousand Words," Fall '92Accompanied by a column by Nathaniel Cade. He did quite a bit of damage to himself, cutting tendons and nerves. His friend, also drunk at the time, drove him to the local hospital where he underwent emergency surgery to reconnect his wrist. Thankfully, they didn't kill anyone along the way to the hospital, since I saw his friend about two hours later and he could barely speak coherently -- never mind drive a car. The next morning I saw my friend, wrist in sling and beer in hand. Alcoholics, it seems, never learn -- he flatly denies he has a problem. He proceeded to undergo therapy and, of course, the medical costs were enormous. The window pane in question was part of the front door of a house. It had been smashed around 3 a.m. the night before. A none-too-smart would-be burglar used his fist to smash the glass in order to unlock the door, cutting himself in the process. Since window repair-types generally take the weekends off like most people, it was impossible to get the glass replaced until Monday. In the meantime, the broken glass had been cleaned up along with the thief's blood. Some broken glass remained around the edges of the window because it was too dangerous to touch without glass cutters and proper safety equipment. Of course anyone with common sense would be able to avoid cutting themselves. Naturally my friend, in his inebriated state, didn't have any common sense. Now, who is at fault for my friend's accident? The thief? The homeowner? The glass manufacturer? George Bush? Of course, my friend's injury was entirely his own fault. Had he not been drinking and had he not been fooling around with the broken glass, he would not have hurt himself. In other words, if he had some responsibility and self-discipline, he would not face the medical bills he does today. Of course, his lawyer doesn't see it that way. The lawyer has filed a claim with the homeowner's insurance company, backed up with the threat of a lawsuit. The claim alleges that if security bars had been in place, the glass never would have been broken and my friend would not have injured himself. This is kind of like saying that had a homeowner installed a security system the intruder would have been scared off rather than shot by the homeowner when he broke into the house. Nowhere does the claim say anything about taking responsibility for one's own actions. Last year, a woman filed a lawsuit in which she said the defendant had caused her to lose her psychic powers. The jury, all of whom must have been relatives of Jean Dixon, awarded a ridiculous sum of money as compensation. Hell, why not? After all, they probably reasoned, the insurance company will pay for it. This is the same logic my friend and his lawyer are using to threaten the homeowner with a lawsuit. They're not actually hurting the defendant, they're just soaking money out of the insurance companies. Of course, guess who is first to complain whenever insurance rates go up: those jurors and anyone else who has ever believed that a whiplash victim deserves $5 million for the injuries they suffered in a fender bender. Those damn insurance companies, they're trying to bleed us dry! I won't stand for it! This is robbery! Right they are, it is robbery. Every time some telelawyer -- "Call 1-900-IAM-HURT, no fee for initial consultation, Call now, first 50 callers win a free gift, Call now." -- convinces a jury of ignorants -- people who pay premiums, but are -- that the poor woman whop broke her fingernail in the restroom door at work deserves $600,000 for her emotional suffering, the insurance companies are being ripped off. Like any good capitalist organization however, when given the choice of going bankrupt or passing the cost on to the consumer, guess which one they choose? And whose fault is that? This whole problem is driven by two things. One, a society which has been taught by 12 years of Republican leadership -- aided and abetted by gutless congressional Democrats -- that it can always get something for nothing. Two, an unbelievebly large number of leeches -- excuse me -- lawyers, who are perfectly willing to take advantage of society's greed. Dan "my daddy never pulled any strings to get me into law school" Quayle actually said something intelligent when he attacked the bar for its greed, lack of ethics and its surplus of lawyers who know more about workers compensation than the Constitution. This seems rather funny from a man whose entire career has been based on ass-kissing and influence peddling, but that fact does not deny its essential truth. We have too many lawyers in this country and too many of them have ruined the profession's reputation, as well as the welfare of the country itself. I plan on attending law school next year. I have always believed that the law should be a profession a person should be proud to belong to. A disproportionate number of the great leaders of this nation have been lawyers, as well as some of our most distinguished writers, intellectuals and statesmen. Now, though, it seems that too many people bent on law school are going for the wrong reasons. I appeal to all of you pre-law students out there. Ask yourself why you are going. Is it only because you want to make money? If so, there are better and more productive ways to get rich then spending thousands on law school and a lifetime of pushing papers. If you do go, and you survive three years of law school, then consider your career options carefully. A law degree can open doors to a wide variety of careers, many of which lead to power and money -- but many of which can also greatly benfit the society in which you live. I may be naive and idealistic, but at least I will always be able to look myself in the mirror every morning, and I can guarantee that you will always be able to turn on your television and you won't ever see me pushing the injury helpline. Brian Newberry is a senior Urban Studies and American History major from Wallingford, Connecticut. "A Thousand Words" appears alternate Tuesdays.

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