DPOSTM beats Weenies at Franklin Field
DPOSTM's Greatest Show on SprinTurf notches beautiful 84-77 victory over non-Sports losers
December 11, 2013, 10:13 pm·
Michele Ozer | DP
When DPOSTM is on its game, Weenies never win.
And on a frigid Wednesday afternoon at Franklin Field, DPOSTM was on its game just enough to secure a dramatic 84-77 victory over the News Weenies of The Daily Pennsylvanian at the 2013 Kamin Cup. DPOSTM quarterback Alex Ott found Chicken McNugget Editor-elect Steven Tydings in the back of the end zone as time expired to secure the win.
That game-winning touchdown capped a back-and-forth affair that featured a big play at every turn. DPOSTM starting quarterback Jimmy Lengyel finished with five passing touchdowns, four interceptions and a rushing touchdown, but it was Sports’ John Phillips who was named Kamin Cup MVP. Phillips provided constant pressure on News’ quarterbacks all morning and afternoon, making several acrobatic catches to extend drives and very loudly motivating his teammates, even telling Lengyel at one point to stop playing the game like he was pleasuring his woman.
“He made plays,” Phillips said about himself before grabbing a Gatorade at the food cart in front of DRL due to intense postgame muscle spasms.
Also going all out on the afternoon was Seamus Powers, a promising young Sports staff writer that the Weenies stole for Kamin Cup. Powers quarterbacked the Weenies to a 35-28 halftime lead and even kicked off the scoring early in the first quarter with a 25-yard interception return for a touchdown on the other side of the ball, giving News a 7-0 lead. But Powers left the game after the third quarter, saying he had to go listen to Bruce Springsteen’s Nebraska album.
Picking up the slack for News was outgoing Pizza Editor Steven Jaffe, who engineered two fourth-quarter touchdown drives for the Weenies while desperately wishing he could play for DPOSTM.
“I BETTER BE STARTING QUARTERBACK NEXT YEAR!,” Jaffe screamed after the game.
In fact, the fourth quarter looked like it belonged to News for a while. Trailing 56-42, the Weenies struck paydirt on the opening play of the final stanza, with DPOSTM stalwart Titus Adkins tipping a Weenies deep pass right to DPOSTM staff writer-turned News wideout Corey Henry. Adkins’ natural speed served DPOSTM well throughout the game, although his gloves did not.
Tied at 77-77 apiece and with time winding down, Ott drove his team the length of the field but got sacked by the Weenies’ Ellen Frierson on third down deep in News territory. Although she joined the game late, Frierson became an impact player in the fourth quarter, no doubt inspired by football spiral-throwing pointers from DPOSTM player/coach Mike Tony.
“I just wanted to get the game over with at that point,” Frierson said. “I need to go be a debutante later.”
It was also Tony who came down with a game-saving fourth-down reception following Frierson’s sack, setting up Tydings’ game-winning grab a few plays later.
“I think [Tydings’] scoring ability really has nothing to do with the overall outcome of the game,” Tony said. “We felt like we could get whatever we wanted in the red zone. I can’t say this is his coming-out party.”
And even though DPOSTM visibly missed wide receiver Riley Steele DP on offense while Steele was busy visiting China in the first half, DPOSTM got what it wanted offensively early and often – although so did News. Lengyel found Phillips in the right corner of the end zone to tie the game at 7-7 shortly after Powers’ pick six, and the two departments were knotted up at 14-14 after a Jaffe touchdown reception late in the quarter. Another scoring catch near the left sideline from 34th Street representative Sam Brodey gave the Weenies a 21-14 lead.
“It’s not just one particular guy, it’s just the team having a defensive DNA,” Tony said. “Everybody being engaged in every defensive action. We get a possession where there’s two guys locked in and the other eight guys are out to lunch.”
DPOSTM’s defense reached its nadir in the fourth quarter, when Jaffe scrambled right and found football-allergic Jennifer Yu in the end zone for a wide-open touchdown.
“It was beautiful,” Yu said.
Ultimately, though, DPOSTM got just enough stops to pull out a win. From Mike Wisniewski to Christine Chen to Allison Bart to Habeeb Suara, DPOSTM got the team unity and cohesiveness it needed to banish the Weenies back to loserville.
“Guys put forth the right effort. Guys closed out. Guys showed up big,” Tony said.
And as a result, like The Cane, the basketball or cups for pop, the Kamin Cup is staying where it belongs – with DPOSTM.