1. Toasting Penn
The most celebrated of all Penn football traditions. At the end of the third quarter, the Penn Band plays the song "Drink a Highball." When the song was written, the drinking age was 18, so the crowd at Franklin Field literally drank "a toast to dear old Penn." But when the drinking age was raised to 21, that couldn't happen anymore -- at least not legally. So Penn students started throwing toast on the field instead. The hailstorm of toast and other bread products coming out of the bleachers is a sight that is truly unlike any other in college sports. When it is over, a "toast zamboni" is driven along the track to clean everything up. But the fun doesn't end there -- make sure to stick around for the fourth quarter.
2. Dan 'Coach Lake' Staffieri
You can't miss Dan Staffieri standing on the sidelines. During the week, "Coach Lake" makes all kinds of witty posters that he hangs on the walls of Penn's locker room to motivate the players. On Saturday, he's even harder to miss. You'll see him on the track, wearing a bright red suit and Ivy League championship rings on every finger. And you'll hear him through the megaphone he always has at his side. He leads the crowd in chanting "Here we go Quakers, here we go." He also enjoys asking the crowd how it's doing during the game. The answer is simple: "Oh, very well."
3. 'Hang Jeff Davis' Song
Every time the Quakers score, the Penn Band leads the students in singing this song, whose tune mimics the Battle Hymn of the Republic -- except for the bridge in the middle. Suffice to say that on Parents' Weekend, you might want to keep it down when chanting the lady's answer to the question of whether she's got any ice today. Or not, but we won't guarantee that the band will be loud enough to drown you out. Regardless, Penn's high-powered offense should give you plenty of chances to practice.
4. Cheerleaders' push-ups
When you're done singing "Hang Jeff Davis," start counting out loud the number of points Penn has scored. The cheerleaders will do a push-up for each one. Keep in mind that they can't always tell if you're still counting, or just yelling "four" over and over again to confuse them. They usually figure it out after a while, though. When they finally get up, wave your index finger around in the air and slowly chant "We want more!" Points, that is. Really, the football is more entertaining, and the cheerleaders deserve at least an occasional break when Penn runs up the score.
5. 'Key' plays
It's third down, the clock is ticking and Penn is trying to keep the other team out of the end zone. That's what you call a key play in the game, right? So get out your keys and wave them around. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But it's the thought -- and the noise -- that counts. So stop sitting there and do something.
