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Finally: PennCourseReview to Add Category for How “Chill” Professor Is

(11/03/17 9:58pm)

Ever since the advanced registration period has opened up, students have been scrambling to find the best classes. One way students search for courses is to see student ratings on the ‘PennCourseReview’ website, which provides ratings on a 4.0 scale in 11 different categories. But while students are able to see ratings for aspects such as “Instructor Accessibility”, “Ability to Stimulate Interest”, and “Amount Learned”, they are often left looking for more detail. That is why PennCourseReview is going to add a new category, the second addition since the site's inception: “Instructor Chillness”.

Wow! This Student Can Locate the Natty Light in Any Grocery Store but Still Can't Find the Clitoris

(11/03/17 5:35am)

Jamie Harper (W '20) may seem like any other college sophomore, but he has a natural gift—a "Natty" gift, if you will. He can spot the cases of Natural Light beer in any grocery store he enters. Blindfolded, spun around three times, and walking on his hands, Harper can and will find the crown jewel of the beverage aisle. But sadly, his sensing abilities can only extend so far. 

This Girl Flushed 5 Times But Swears It Was Just the Motion Detector

(11/03/17 3:42am)

Emily Johnston (C '19) recalls standing by the sink in a Huntsman bathroom when she heard the first flush. “I had just finished washing my hands when I heard the toilet do its thing. Thinking nothing of it, I went to get a paper towel,” Johnston said in an exclusive interview outside Steinberg-Dietrich Hall. “As I was about to get a paper towel, I heard it again. I don't often raise an eyebrow to the sound of two flushes, but I stood still for a second, waiting for the familiar sound of the opening stall door. I wanted to know who my bathroom companion was.” That was the moment she remembers everything changing.

Nice! Your Date Night Pics Are Here and Your Eyes Look Pretty Glazed Over

(11/02/17 4:04am)

You had a pretty sweet date night two Thursdays ago. First, you went to a sick BYO— ate some vaguely Asian food, drank a quart of Sunset Blush, the usual. Then, you hopped in an Uber and drove 8 blocks to the venue. Even better? The bouncer your date's frat hired totally fell for your IDGod Connecticut and gave you a wristband. Haha, like, you're not gonna be 21 for another 4 months. Sweet! Good thing you paid $12 for a jack and coke and sipped it in a designated section of the club while everyone else danced. Can you say awesome?

Smart: Student Invents “Director of Reverse Philanthropy” Position for Club Board

(11/02/17 4:09am)

It’s club/organization election time again, and the competition is fierce. As all Penn students have come to know, getting into college is just the beginning of the cutthroat application process. Students may get disheartened by the scarcity of opportunity for so many qualified applicants.

Sweet! Professor Gives Class Halloween Candy, But Will Also Give Majority a Final Grade of "B-" or Below

(11/01/17 5:25pm)

Pre-med freshman John McArthur (C ’21) was feeling jaded, to say the least. He was just railed by his sixth round of midterms last week, he spent his bank account down to $6.73 over the Halloweekend at a slew of downtowns, and his parents recently refused to continue funding his recent Juul addiction, which he’s actually in denial about. Yikes!

Eight Gorgeous Orchards You Can Visit, Take a Picture, and Leave

(11/01/17 9:58pm)

Love cute profile pictures but despise nature? UTB sent its reporters across the Northeast to find the perfect orchards that you can visit and take a picture before immediately getting back into your roommates' Honda Accord and getting the hell out of there. Channel your faux-Thoreau and take a trip to these great locations!