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Things Longer Than Winter Break

By MJ KANG

December 8, 2016 at 6:50 pm

Winter break is too damn short. To put its shortness in perspective, here is a list of things that are longer than Winter break.

  1. The walk to DRL

  2. Hanukkah

  3. Amount of time you wait for a text back

  4. Kim K’s 72 day marriage with Kris Humphries

  5. Time it takes to jack off a horse

  6. A Half Marathon

  7. Kanye’s cancelled Pablo tour

  8. Your junior high relationships

  9. Transcript of deleted emails between Amy G and Hilary

  10. Your #mcm’s mile time

  11. Johnny Manziel’s NFL career

  12. Jay Leto’s Joker scenes in Suicide Squad

  13. Those Bee Movie meme videos

  14. Jim Webb's presidential campaign

  15. The wait for omelettes at Commons

  16. Steel beams that can’t be melted by jet fuel

  17. Trump’s Hands

  18. The asparagus plant

  19. List of grievances at Highrises

  20. Your girlfriend’s leg hair in the winter

  21. Your last hangover

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