Published 11 hours ago

Penn Porn: Autumnal Edition, Vol. 2

If you've been a bit of a curmudgeon for no apparent reason in the last few weeks, you're not a bitch. You're just another poor soul suffering from in-between seasonal affective disorder. Ordering a toasty PSL when it's 72 degrees outside and always being inappropriately dressed for the weather no matter what you wear can really get to you.

Well, the temperature hit 70 for the last time for a very long time this week, which means it's finally basically  fall! Anyone who's been to campus around this time knows that autumn is what Penn was made for-- actually though. Our main administrative building is literally orange. In celebration, we're bringing back Penn Porn! Send your sexiest seasonal sightings to tips@underthebutton.com by next Sunday 10/26 and we'll post the best.


Features  Published 10/18/14 5:34pm

Random Dude At A Party, Vol. 2

Welcome back to Random Dude at a Party, a feature in which we bring you the wisdom of random dudes doing what Penn does best: partying. This week's fellow's identity will remain anonymous, but his Internet fame shall live on for eternity. Drum roll please...

October 17, 2014

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News  Published 10/18/14 12:01pm

New Drinking Device Solves A Problem That Didn't Need Solving

A recent invention from an ambitious bro has proven that frat life isn’t all about getting crunk; it’s about getting crunk efficiently. Ah, classic Penn. 

The snapshotr (which honestly just makes us think of Snapchat) brings the shot game to a whole new level. To follow a shot with a chaser back in the Dark Ages, you had to take time out of your packed drinking schedule to pour two different liquids into two different cups. What a waste! Now the process is much simpler. You just pour, unlock, lock, pour, drink, and then unlock while drinking. Say that five times fast! Alas, thanks to this enlightened solution, we can already feel time in our Google Calendars freeing up.


 Published 10/17/14 5:47pm

Explore Every One Of Qdoba's Extra For Free

In Qdoba's words, "extras are no longer extra". FINALLY they did what they should have done years ago: make their guacamole, queso and fajita veggies free with any purchased entree

It appears that their exorbitant generosity and willingness to stay open late suggest only one thing: the quest to win over loyal Chipotle-goers is on. That's still pretty unlikely, but then again, when you're ballin' on a budget, free queso sounds pretty damn good. 


News  Published 10/17/14 3:27pm

The Great College/High School Snafu of 2014

Ah, the classic listserv mix-up. It's really a tale as old as time. Sometimes you're fooled into giving your social security number to hundreds of people, other times basic internet privacy somehow just escapes your grasp. Humiliating, but it happens to the best of us.  

Earlier this week, an anonymous Penn professor accidentally forwarded an announcement for an event at Drexel CLEARLY geared towards high school students to a whole undergrad listserv. Though the Student TV Day does sound pretty ballin', even the quickest of read-throughs shows that this event was solely intended for the under 18 set. What's funnier than the unintended mistake, however, is her all-business follow-up. Oh unnamed Penn prof, we'll always love you, but know that we definitely won't get a waiver signed by our parents.

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 Published 10/17/14 1:32pm

Flyerer Of The Week: SPEC Concerts

If you've been within a 5-mile radius of Locust this week you've definitely seen, heard, and tried to avoid eye contact with the SPEC booth blasting music. Maybe you were just minding your own business and they chased you down to buy tickets. Well, the members of SPEC make no apologies. Read on to see what they said:

Who are you guys and what are you flyerering for?

 

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 Published 10/17/14 11:29am

Locust Flaikus

There's nothing we love more than being assaulted welcomed back from fall break by the overenthusiastic flyerers that grace Locust Walk. But if you're looking to battle post-break blues, fatten up for the upcoming winter hibernation, or lose that fall break home-cooked-food weight, we've got you covered. If you're lucky, you might even get to pet some puppies:

Alpha Kappa Delta Phi 13th Annual BCA Coffeehouse

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 Published 10/16/14 2:30pm

How To Get MERTed At All Times Of Day

The mysterious heroes of the Medical Emergency Response Team will now be emerging from their top secret fortress located under Ware and saving us all 24/7 on weekends rather than 5PM-7AM. Why, you ask, would one need to be MERTed at 4PM on a Sunday? There are so many possibilities. Here are but a few.**

8AM

You fall out of bed reaching for water and you should actually contact MERT because we did this once and got a concussion.

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 Published 10/16/14 1:01pm

STREET Presents: Taking Attendance

It's the week after fall break and damn, did it feel long? Luckily we have some #streeats to numb the pain, all in our Fall Dining Guide. There are 17 reviews of Philly's newest and best restaurants, serving up the best mac and cheesehummusmeatballsMexican brunch and gnocchi this city has to offer. Get ready and get eating (share your meals with us on instagram @34streetmag).

In our regular mag, we dive into a big issue: Penn's relationships with public schools in West Philadelphia. Read the piece and leave us a comment with your thoughts. We're all still thinking about it. If you want to get into a fall fitness routine, Ego has a great workout, straight from an athlete and Mr. Penn contestant.

Food has the lowdown on Sweetgreen's new menu, Arts tells you why 3rd Street is worth a visit and Music will take you back with songs that remind you of your first kiss. Lowbrow is still processing fall break, namely that one trip to Montreal that was totally lifechanging. Backpage takes a closer look at patterns around campus and Highbrow tells us about a very chill drug dealer. Email us to get in touch with her. This week is the Philadelphia Film Festival and Street scored an exclusive interview with the writer, director and producer of "Dear White People," Justin Simien. A must read and must see. 

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 Published 10/15/14 4:42pm

SHUTTERBUTTON: Halloween 91 Years Ago

With October 31st only 16 days away, we flash back this week to the Roaring Twenties, a time on campus when you could get into a party--erm, "Frolic"--with the above invitation, Hallowe'en was spelled with an apostrophe, DANCING sufficed as a party description, and all the rich kids went to West Egg for Fall Break. Oh, the good old days. Still not excited for next weekend? Grab your masques, and let's dance (in church) like it's 1923.


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