The fifth floor of Van Pelt Library has been stripped to its bare bones. All that remains is an awkward modern seating area and a glass staircase protruding from the fancy ass sixth floor. What's being built here? Where are the books? Why is it sometimes being vacuum cleaned? We don't know. And Van Pelt won't tell us. So, we've decided to speculate on a few possible uses of this mysterious concrete cavern.
- It's going to be a boxing ring because the last round of OCR is actually like fight club and it has to take place on campus.
- It's going to be a playroom to leave your friends when you go study just like your mom used to do when she went grocery shopping.
- It's going to be a nice warm place for all the dogs on campus to meet up at night and play poker while PennVet is under construction.
- It's going to be a space for the crossover between 50 Shades of Grey and the Wharton start-up incubator because it has lot of hard surfaces and open spaces to experiment.
- It's going to be a rehearsal space for Penn's ONLY grad student dance troupe because the graduate students need to be able to quickly steal their registered carrels at all times.