At one point or another on Wednesday, you thought a number of
things. You thought Emma Watson was enrolling at Penn; you thought Penn banned
hard alcohol, and that your Netflix was a goner. You were a victim of the
system DP’s joke issue. It's okay, you weren't alone.
But c’mon, didn’t these fantasies sound a tad familiar? Remember when Ariana Grande was coming to Penn, or when Penn deemed losing a PennCard worthy of academic probation? When Skulls was set to take over Amy’s house, or when Amy Gutmann said marijuana for all?
Nevertheless, people fell for it. Hard. And in a few days,
when your tears have dried and this whole snafu becomes a thing of the past,
you’ll probably think it’s funny too. Until then, check out these Penn-goers who
are just like you, and maybe delete those
embarrassing overeager Facebook