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Satire  Published 05/12/18 2:34am

Brave! Wharton Freshman Decides to Do Finance for a Few Years Before Going Into Philanthropy

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Photo by National Assembly for Whales / CC BY 2.0


Wharton freshman Ethan Browdy has decided to enter the finance industry for a few years before launching a non-profit startup.

Ethan’s choice has been widely heralded for its originality and positive effect on the world.

“How can you help others if you can’t help yourself?” Ethan told Under the Button. “I just need to have some money to be able to support myself before I can help others.”

When we asked him why he needed to sell out before going into a philanthropy job that would be able to support him anyway, he said, “I just think I should taste the opulent lifestyle afforded to those who know how to move money around before saving the dregs of society.”

Browdy’s startup will center around an online interface that allows nurses to locate different parts of their patients’ bodies.

“I call it, ‘Eyes or Thighs?’ and I think it will be really useful. It will, right?”


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