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Satire  Published 11/04/17 12:12pm

Student Who Hates Penn Wears Penn Sweatshirt Daily

sweater

Photo by Yolanda Chen / The Daily Pennsylvanian 


For most students, wearing school clothing is a sign of pride. When they don that classic collegiate sweatshirt, they’re showing to everyone who sees them how much they love their school, and how happy they are to be there.

Not Anna.

College senior Anna Nelson wears her blue Penn sweatshirt almost every single day, yet she says she has no love for the school whose logo she displays around campus daily. “I’d rather live on a mosquito farm than go to Penn,” she said.

Nelson’s friends agree that no one hates Penn more than Nelson. “Mostly all she talks about is how much she despises Penn, and how she hates all her so-called ‘friends’ here,” Nelson’s friend Doug Dougherty said. Junior Brianna Daniels also noted, “She’ll text my a couple times a day, just saying ‘get me out of this place.’ No one hates Penn more than Anna. We keep telling her to transfer, but she says her alumni parents would disown her if she did that.”

Despite her obvious hatred for the university, Nelson continues to wear her Penn sweatshirt daily.

“I started wearing this sweatshirt when I was a high school senior and I was still excited about Penn,” she said. “I guess it became a habit.” She added, “It’s also my most comfortable sweatshirt, which is important, because after being worn down by this disgusting hellhole, I need to feel good any way I can.”

Nelson says she can’t see herself not wearing the sweatshirt, or enjoying Penn. “I’ve always worn this sweatshirt, and I probably always will, regardless of how much I absolutely detest this soul-sucking institution,” she said.

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