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Features  Published 09/25/17 1:02am

10 Reasons Why I Just Can't With Sophie Right Now

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Photo by Maxpixel / Public Domain


Sophie was my best friend freshman year, and is one of the best people I know. We are now roommates. Here are the top 10 reasons I honestly just can't with Sophie right now.

1. She’s just not the same. 

a. You know when people change? I just feel duped. 

2. Stop harassing me, Sophie! 

a. I’m sorry I left my laundry and three empty vodka bottles in the middle of the floor. Sue me!

3. I just need some space...

a. Sometimes I just need space from her but she’s always there. Like, leave me ALONE Sophie. You’re obsessed with me!

4. Maybe it's me?

a. Honestly, though, I can promise you it's not. 

5. Sometimes I feel like we don’t talk anymore.

a. I need space, but I also want a confidant who will listen to all my problems and help me fix them. I don’t think she’s ready to be there for me. 

6. She’s being the worst. 

a. I don’t think I should have to explain myself for this one. It's kind of just a vibe I get. 

7. Sophie snores really loudly. 

a. That’s not the only reason I can't with her TRUST me, but honestly it’s been a lot to handle. Like, she KNEW she snored and failed to mention that to me. Weird. I don’t know, just weird. 

8. Fool me once, shame on Sophie. 

a. Two days ago Sophie promised she would fill up the Brita filter, because she finished it off. I am currently on my bed staring at an empty Brita filter. Humans can only go three days without water. Is she trying to kill me? You decide. 

9. Did you know that she liked Math 104?

a. This should’ve been a sign. I ignored it last year but I can’t ignore it anymore. I think she’s a sociopath. 

10. Sophie just walked into the room. 

a. Really, Sophie? When I’m trying to process my feelings. Really? Let me BREATHE, Sophie.

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