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Satire  Published 03/14/17 8:23pm

Student Demands Removal of All Campus References to Ben Franklin in Light of "Horrific" Daylight Saving Time

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Photo: hey tiffany! / Flickr


In an inspiring demonstration of what it means to be extra, College freshman Roshan Rulio has launched an ambitious effort to remove Benjamin Franklin from campus. The charge? Rulio alleges that Franklin created the "horrific", "misguided", and "frankly illogical" idea of Daylight Saving Time.

"Dude, do you know how much sleep I lost the night we 'sprang forward'? Because of that stupid system, I only got eight hours, a full hour less than what I should have gotten. I'm still trying to catch up on sleep, and my writing sem assignments are making that really difficult. That's just not acceptable," Rulio said, oblivious to the eye-rolls of more than a dozen upperclassmen. 

"This is the fault of only one man—Ben Franklin. Despite all his contributions to science and government, he's a monster for this," the freshman added. Rulio, who has one hour of class starting at 1pm on Tuesdays and Thursdays and no class on Fridays, is planning to use his free time to demonstrate and petition for the removal of all statues, pictures, quotes, and fossilized remains of Benjamin Franklin from Penn's campus. 

A simple google search would have shown Rulio that Benjamin Franklin is not really the father of Daylight Saving Time. Franklin mentioned an idea similar to Daylight Saving Time in 1784 in a French journal, proposing jokingly that people could wake up earlier and save money on candles. His reputation as the originator of DST is widely accepted, but erroneous.

"It's like, okay, if you wanna save money on candles go ahead," Rulio said, ignoring the fact that Franklin is not to blame for Daylight Saving Time. "I already have a ton from Bed Bath and Beyond, so I'm good." 

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