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Random Dude At A (Dorm) Party, Vol. 4

Butcher, Ware, November 9, 2014

Q: Why didn’t you vote in the recent election?

A: Bitch I voted! Don’t fucking tell me what to do [laughing]. 

Q: What’s your spirit animal?

A: My spirit animal? My spirit animal would have to be, um…that dolphin on the Penn logo. Like, I don’t know why it's there but it's definitely the one.

Q: What were you for Halloween?

A: For Halloween? Oh, it was so funny. I was Damien, from Mean Girls, and it was funny because I’m pretty gay, and there were these girls on my hall, and they were the mean girls, and it was fun.

Q: Who were the girls?

A: ---, ---, and ---. And they still have my backpack with my earphones. So if they want to return it, that would be cool.

Q: If God sneezes, what should you say?

A: (inexplicably whispering) Can I pass on a question?

Q: Yes.

A: I pass on this question.

Q: Would you kiss me if I had mono?

A: Yeah.

Q: Would you kiss me if I didn’t have mono?

A: Yeah!

Q: How do you feel about Highland Hill Farms not wanting to hire Penn grads?

A: That’s frankly disrespectful because you don’t know what we want to do when we graduate, and I just maybe want to work there, and just because I took this writing seminar class because writing seminar is ass, doesn’t mean that I should be disqualified from working at a farm.

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